Such an emotional last 24 hours. I still can't get my head around it. Sending my love to everyone here. Chester's friends/family & Linkin Park. Stay strong everyone.
Is it just a bad dream or a never ending nightmare? I'm still not over the fact that the person I worshipped and idolized is no more with us. Linkin Park was more than a band to me, it was my get away ticket to the wonderland where I could live in peace. I was in love with Chester's voice. Never in million years I imagined something like this would happen, that my wonderland would turn into a haunting memory. Listening to Linkin Park will never be the same for me. Maybe I'll concentrate more on the lyrics this time where Chester is crying for help, where he's trying to share his pain with all of us. That's it for me, I don't have a bucket list anymore because it started with watching Linkin Park Live and it ended with Chester giving up on his life. Maybe I'll be fine in few weeks or months. Or maybe I'll live with a heavy heart which will haunt me everyday, which will remind me that I've lost the most important part of my life.
I am a long time lurker and used to be active on LPU and the official website back in the day. I don't know what to say, I still can't believe this, I am still in denial that this cannot be true. Linkin Park is a very special band for me and Chester is someone who I could relate to. Their music helped me overcome a lot of things. My cousin told me about it Yesterday and I was like its the old bullshit hoax, but then when I searched, it was actually true and I started crying. It was the same feeling when my best friend died in 2008, I broke down and could not believe it. I did not know Chester personally, but he was a part of me and basically everyone on here. I honestly did not expect this news. He seemed happy, they finished their tour a few weeks ago, he was mingling with the fans, he did not look depressed at all. I know he was very sad about the dead of Chris, but I did not expect Chester to take this drastic step. I am still in denial and thinking that this cannot be true, what could be going through his mind, did he plan this months ago, he was supposed to meet the band for the photoshoot and one band member was supposed to pick him up in the morning. I am feeling so sad and feeling so broken from inside, its so hard to believe that one person who I looked up to is no more. It would be really awful for his family and his friends, I wish Chester thought once about them before taking this step. I guess the album One More Light was his saying Goodbye to all of us.
I still don't believe it. Like literately, it hasn't even really registered that we will no longer be hearing his voice or seeing any more of him, at all. I usually don't feel emptiness towards celebrity deaths, but this is the one. Totally confusing, because again, there's emptiness but I can't even register why even though logically, I know. I tried reaching out to close loved ones, to try to feel my pain. I just want someone to be sad with, but they're just blasé about the whole thing. Thankfully, my girlfriend sat there with my last night and she was sad with me. Sometimes, that's all anyone needs, just someone to listen to your stories and memories of a band that has influenced your taste in art, music, entertainment, work ethic, and ideas. Every band member has their own personality, but I really connected with Chester's story personally and reaching into my mid 20s, I can feel that everything is going to be alright. I had to get away from the mainstream social media and come over here where his life affected our lives. Again, just the blasé reaction from everyone is not doing it for me. Maybe I am looking at his passing the wrong way, but I am also seeing how it is affecting me in my own personal world. Just to see how cold some people can be, like fine, if a celebrity death doesn't affect you, okay, but when you personally know me and don't understand or can't empathize what I am going through, fuck off. People saying suicide is a selfish act, fuck off too. Anyone who says that clearly does not understand what mental disorders are. Depression is a chemical imbalance within your brain. Telling someone with chronic depression, "hey, be happy, don't kill yourself" is like telling someone with diabetes, "hey, just produce more insulin". I don't judge what happened, I'm not even mad at the people who say this, just an easy way for me to filter out the people who I need in my life and who I don't. Something I learned from Linkin Park's music is that "you cannot please everyone", and that statement is something that helps me realize I don't have to like everyone and just find like minded people that I care for and who care for me. One of my favorite stories I love telling from when I discovered Linkin Park is when I first heard of them. I grew up in a ghetto area in Chicago where Hip-Hop and Rap ran the streets. My buddy invites me over to his house to hangout and he pulls out this secret collection of his brother's he had. He pops in Hybrid Theory, put the volume on low and we listened like if we were living in Communist Russia where'd they execute you if they heard you listen to heavy music like that. My fucking 8 year old head almost blew up. I have been listening to them ever since. Picked up their latest CDs when they released. Every new song and every new iteration of what music meant to Chester, I listened to, judgment free, because I trusted that he and the rest of Linkin Park put hard work into each song. I wanted my first tattoos the same as Chester's wrist flame tattoos, but then realized, na only that guy can pull it off lol. I grew up super apathetic, just lazy. I would skip school to listen to their albums for the 100th time. Just teen angst. Then getting into highschool, I saw the maturity within Minutes to Midnight. Their shift in style was synonymous with the shift of my attitude. With the changing environment of what being a child into a young adult meant, just sort of happens, but their music lead me to recognize logically that "oh yeah, humans change. We shed our old behaviors to adopt new ones". Then A Thousand Suns dropped, and my dick got hard for them all over again. Just in college, trying to find that inspiration to work harder, and this is the album that did it. Just the conception of what it meant was enough for me to realize that "ohh yeah, there's people who do care about the bigger picture, I'm not alone in this poor and hungry environment." Living Things and The Hunting Party just helped push that vision throughout the years. Nothing's worse when you keep on relying on the same inspirations. I am very logical, working within the Engineering industry, but to have something so emotional reminds me I am human. My family understood what Linkin Park means to me, but did not feel their vibe until recently with the drop of One More Light. It's mutual with everyone I know that One More Light has some great songs in it, and I'm happy that we can finally connect. Was never really close with my siblings or parents, but this is the album that helped me actually be a part of them. Chester helped me connect with my loved ones. I finally bust out crying late last night, listening to the obvious songs like Leave out All the Rest and Shadow of the Day. I am a very empathetic person, but at the same time, very grounded. I hope everyone takes this the right way when I say that for me, that silver lining to his passing brings new meaning to me with Linkin Park's music. I actually feel like I'm young again listening to them for the 1st time and everytime I cry is like weight being lifted off my shoulders. Idk, just a weird week for me in general. I know how "lame" it is to have your favorite band being Linkin Park and anytime you mention it just brings conversations of "I like their first 2 albums better" but I walk into a Sushi restaurant this week and their playing their music. I'm just singing along while the waitresses and friend are smiling in joy. I wish there were some single names I have in my personal life that reached out to me to pay condolences towards me just because it's no secret how much they mean to me. 90% of the time, I'm listening to them in my car, to the point where my friends get annoyed lol. Idk, if you finished reading this long rambling, thank you for reading my story. I hope to read through everyone else's memories and much love.
Aside from my immediate family, not one single person has helped me become who I have today more than him. Without sounding too soppy, I didn't have the easiest of times growing up, but over the last 17 years there has only been one constant in my life and that is the music of Linkin Park . Any time I was angry, any time I was hurt, any time I hit a trough in my life I could always turn to the messages delivered by Chester's singing for help, for guidance and a way out of being where I didn't want to be. I cannot describe to you how much of a debt I owe this man. A man who himself had so, so many demons to overcome in a battle which ultimately, he lost. I can already feel a huge void in my heart that will probably never ever be replaced. My thoughts and prayers at this time are with his children and his wife, I honestly can't imagine what they are going through right now. Rest in peace Chester, you will be missed by so many and there will never be another like you. Who cares if one more light goes out? Well I do. We love you, Chester. We love you
I haven't posted regularly on these forums in nearly a decade, but my heart broke yesterday. This band was my gateway to guitar music and the first band i totally obsessed over. Chester's screams were the first i liked, i remember seeing One Step Closer on TV after which i felt like a different person and music instantly became my new favorite thing (which hasn't changed since). Thank you Chester/Linkin Park for shaping my musical tastes and giving that awkward kid a voice. RIP Chester, it feels like i've lost a friend.
2nd post of mine on this and I want to say that I hope I don't offend anyone, but when I heard of him passing and the way he went out I thought, "ohh, of course. That definitely sounds like Chester." Dude lived and died like a rockstar, he literately lived life the way he wanted to. Always at 1000mph. No matter at what stage in his life, he was always so engaged. From my own personal story of meeting the band to everyone else's, he always seemed so engaged in every interaction. He helped me become a better person just by his lyrics alone. I don't personally struggle with depression but he sure as hell helped me empathize and helped me tap into that emotional side of me. Thanks again Chester.
10 people ? Wow, I am so sorry to hear that man. I definitely agree with your advice, just take this day by day. If you need to cry, just let it out. I find that it is also okay to be congruent with your emotions. If you need to talk to someone, as unrelatable as it is with others, just admitting one of your idols passed away and it is hitting you and are feeling down can help others empathize with you. I went through a tough breakup last year, and it literately feels like you lose someone. Someone you called your best friend, to never be seen again. I turned on Linkin Park through that time and it helped me find meaning during that confusing part of my life. I woke up every night in a cold sweat, and if I knew I wanted to see her again, I had to make a lifestyle change. As mentioned before, I was super apathetic, super lazy and their music helped me push through to work towards my passions and career and improve my health and lifestyle all together. Chester and the band brought me back onto my feet. After I heard they were releasing the new album, I had an epiphany that "hey, if they're still working after all these years, so am I." Eventually, I attracted her back. They helped me tap into the part of me that I didn't know existed. That's why I love Linkin Park so much; they write music in broad ranges of emotions. From: Sadness, to happiness. To moments of breaking free to heartbreaks. To important factors of life like friends and family to grinding through life. I love it all.
Who would be willing to spread LP's message around with me as tribute to Chester and everyone who's fought a battle with depression? I feel like it's more important than ever and I want to snuff out the negative ignorance some trolls might spread. RIP Chester.
If you're feeling like you cannot cope - log into LPA. - the beauty of Linkin Park, and why Chester is so loved, and how much it brings people together. People are always here to chat, to share, to carry. The Linkin Park community is a beautiful thing. Listening to the One More Light album today, it's unsettling and haunting and not the uplifting, overcoming summer force I assumed it was. Originally the album swam in its struggles, and was a triumph in turning the page, but it doesn't feel like that anymore "I'm dancing with my demons, I'm standing on the edge" - a man buried under his own weight. It happens to us all. Sometimes there's just nothing you can do. As for what will happen with LP, it's anybody's guess. Mike was the brains but Chester was undeniably the heart, his energy permeated everything from albums to interviews. Music is therapeutic and good for the soul, and it would be a good way for five grieving brothers to diffuse their pain, and to show that Chester and the legacy he built with Linkin Park will never die - the band, the fans, we're all in this together and we'll grieve together. Not sure how I feel if they used old Chester vocals from unreleased tracks though, that's never sat right with me. On the other hand, when the world continues to spin and it's business as usual, are warner as a company going to want to keep plugging money into a property that arguably has lost its most lucrative part? The painful truth is that the major label machine cares not for tragedy, and I think there's legitimate fear there. In a way, One More Light has a finality to it, even before Chesters untimely passing. It feels like 20 years of pain being dealt with and exercised on record. Sharp Edges feels like a swan song, an end credits theme of one of musics (certainly hip hops) most iconic acts. The song is punchy, and reflective, but doesn't outstay it's welcome. It ends suddenly, like human life. It really feels like an end. "We all fall down, we live somehow, we learn what doesn't kill us makes us stronger" --- On a separate note, if anybody is struggling, with anything. You're not alone, and when you feel like you are, you never will be. The isolation can feel daunting, and panicking, but people love you, and people will always be there. Anybody can hit me up anytime, the LPA and the LP Community are family to me, you guys are awesome - don't hesitate to drop a message if it's too heavy to carry by yourself, and I mean that. I joined the LPA in 2011 after a transitional period of life. I don't post much (only when I truly have something to say) - but I've always appreciated the opinions and thoughts of the people here. This is my favourite place on earth. You're all great and full of character - Derek you're a great man. LP(A) forever
Truthfully, I love the new life that older songs are bringing. A big trademark of Linkin Park is that their older albums bring on new meanings as seasons change, or life events happen. Sometimes it takes a while for some of their songs to grow on you. But again, just listening to their older stuff, has new meanings to them. As mentioned before, Chester is the heart and soul to Linkin Park. The fact that he was public about his inner demons, makes these lyrics more visceral. To me, when I hear these songs, it lights a fire under my ass.
Reading all the gutwrenching reactions from fans, musicians and his friends, Chester truly was the light in the title One More Light. The world, including himself just didn't know it. Everything just got a little darker.
24 hours later, still no tears but very much still grieving over our loss. When I told my wife yesterday when she got off work I almost cried. I listened to the This Is: Linkin Park playlist on Spotify and all the songs he is on are just haunting. The one song that almost put me over the edge was Not Alone. I wish I could tell Chester he wasn't alone and that everything will be okay.
This honestly hurts and it's only until now that it's truly settling in. Linkin Park was the band that got me into both rock and hiphop, well, music in general. Chester Bennington played a huge part of that. They were my favorite band growing up and while they hadn't really been a band that I truly listen to these days, those memories haven't faded away. Wanting to listen to the entire discography has been so hard for me just because it's really hard thinking about him actually being gone. I was going to see them in Seattle this year for the first time ever and now I'm here sitting why? I've struggled with clinical depression for years and this just wrecks me. I hope you guys are doing well. I don't know if there's a heaven or an afterlife, but I hope Chester knows he's well loved and missed and is doing well. We'll miss you, dude. Drinking for you today.
The last 30 or so hours have been the hardest ones I've ever dealt with so far in my life. Me and my friend went on a boat ride and was thinking of catching a movie later. Since my friend was leaving the next day we didn't have much time and the weather was nice so he waited until the last second to tell me whether to order tickets or not. I thought the day was going great so far. Then, as I was ready to push the buy tickets button he said, "oh, crap Linking Park vocalist has died" I couldn't believe it. we were swiping all over reddit and other places to find out if it was a hoax or not. at the same time I found out I messed up my application for studying in the fall. which means I have to either wait another year yet again to start or study something I dont really want to. Like many others here I have been lurking around here for like a decade or so now. Never really commented or posted anything. I was around 8 years old when I discovered LP, I remember waiting in the gas station and saw the album cover for Hybrid Theory and thought it looked cool, so I bought it. And I didn't even understand anything from the songs (I'm from Norway). but later I did and have loved everything since. My family is on the verge of destruction. there has been too much lying from my mom and dad, its just a matter of time before they leave each other. I too have been thinking about suicide a few times, thinking if anybody really would miss me if I did it. crying myself to sleep, sometimes sitting there just seconds of doing it. But I didn't and I dont know why. But listening to Linkin Park has always helped me, when watching music videos and live shows its like I am up there with Chester singing my heart out (I can't sing for shit, but I dont care when listening to LP) screaming and crying the pain away with Chester. I have always looked up to him, when in the bathroom getting ready to leave for work I am playing air guitar and singing the songs. For 17 years I have been here with them, from my childhood, my teenage years and now my adult life. Every single day. I am constantly crying today. I can't stop. but writing this feels a little bit better. so I just wanted to say THANK YOU to the LPA for everything. THANK YOU Chester, you were my idol, my favorite, my hero and I love you. I hope you found what your were looking for now and have peace. My love goes to everyone around here, to the other guys, Mike, Brad, Rob, Dave and Joe. And to everyones family.
They should honor him, celebrate his life and what gave to millions of people world wide, they affect his voice had on all of us. I still cant over this this like a dark nightmare, and I cant believe hes gone because of that pure evil depression, its cancer, its pure disgusting, unclean. I hope you're in peace now Chester