Got Something You Want To Let Out Part 2

Who says you're one?

 

I guess I just assumed. Presumptuous of me, maybe.

 

Sorry.

 

You're apologising for nothing, Holdean. (And yes, I will actually start calling you that. I like it. It's either that, or Deanio.)

 

I know it's lame to want but.

I kinda want to be with someone for the holidays. But whatever.

 

It isn't lame.

 

I was thinking of getting a gun license, but if I'd shoot someone even in self defense, I still have a pretty good chance of going jail for it in Belgium... xD

I should get one of those rubber ball guns.

Agree on your last comment too...

 

Yay, my dad is going to stop drinking

 

That's fantastic! My mother used to drink a lot, and she cut down a lot and it's SO much different at home and whatnot.

 

Well, it's not like he's so drunk that he is annoying or anything or hits me. I didn't noticed it because I'm always away or I'm upstairs in my room. I knew that he drank but not THAT much. My mom confronted him about it this morning and then he passed out because he was shocked by the confrontation or something. Then they talked and he said that he wants help I'm glad for him.

I just hope I don't do the same because his dad was also a good drinker.

 

So last night at around quarter to midnight the drummer in my band is driving me home after band practice when we pull into my street to find about 3 police cars and 2 ambulances parked outside my house. At first I thought it was just the usual nonsense that goes on in my area but then I noticed my brother Alex (24) and his brother Will (32, Will's not my brother, he's my brother's brother on his father's side of the family) being loaded into the ambulances. I got out of the car, took all my stuff with me and paced towards the house to find my Mum crying in the arms of our downstairs neighbour Julie. I asked what the hell was going on and the paramedics explained to me that the two idiots had mixed LSD with MDMA while being drunk and had had a major freak out.

Mum told me that she heard Will screaming at the top of of his lungs up in my brothers room and my Mum went upstairs to see what was going on but Alex's girlfriend Marcia was blocking the way screaming for my Mum not to go into the room. Apparently Marcia was completely histerical but eventually got out of the way. When my Mum walked in to the room Will was on the bed screaming and going in and out of freak outs while Alex was on a chair nearly in tears mumbling ''I don't know what to do''. Will had obviously taken more than Alex and Alex was fairly ok but still a bit messed up.

My Mum called for an ambulance and 2 arrived with about 15 police officers (?). Marcia (who the week before spent a night in a jail cell after getting drunk and assaulting a police officer) ran off down the road with her dog and the paramedics and police officers took Alex and Will downstairs to the ambulance. Will was getting pretty violent at this point calling the police cunts and pushing them away etc. so they loaded him into the back of a police wagon first. A few minutes later I arrived home.

The ambulances took them away to the local hospital. My Mum was in tears and I was just angry at what happened. I tried to take my Mum's mind off of things by putting on a film and basically just trying to calm her down. At around half past 3 we got a call from my brother who had had an injection to calm him down. He said he and will were ok etc. when all of a sudden Will starts screaming down the phone at my Mum calling her a cunt for getting Sky news involved saying that he was made a laughing stock on live TV...he was obviously still tripping out because my Mum did no such thing and it wasn't even on Sky news...you can't make this shit up.

Anyway Alex, Will and Marcia turned up at 4am but my Mum didn't want any of them staying here so I answered the door, handed Will all his stuff and let Alex in to get some of his clothes etc. Before Alex left I told him that he really hurt Mum and myself and that he needs to get off the drugs and alcohol because if truth be told it was only a matter of time before something like this happened. He said sorry to me and Mum several times and I could tell he meant it but the damage really was already done. I told him that when I arrived home I thought someone had died with the amount of paramedics and police that were around the place. All the neighbours were out of their houses watching them being loaded into Ambulances and taken off...it really did look like some kind of a crime scene. Anyway, I gave hime £30 and they took a cab back to Marcia's house.

What a fucked up night.

 

I honestly dont understand how some people can have friends when they point out the flaws in practically everything and act like they know everything about anything. Fucking assholes.

 

OK, so, I'm pretty much head-over-heels for my friend's sister, but I almost never talk to her, and tonight would've been a perfect night to talk to her, considering I probably won't see her again over break. It fucking sucks how gunshy I am when it comes to shit like that. She's beautiful, amazingly smart, and a fucking blast to be around, and yet I didn't say a word to her when it was just her and me. I've always been like that and I'm fucking sick and tired of it. I know my friend wouldn't give a shit if I dated her as long as I didn't hurt her, and trust me, I'd have NO plans of hurting her. She's way too amazing. She kept shooting glances my way and stuff all night and I didn't so much as talk to her once. I wished her happy birthday, that's it. Whoopty-fuckin'-doo. God, I'm fucking hopeless.

 

I'm never smoking again! I smoked a whole stick the other day, mainly out of curiosity! Halfway through I started feeling dizzy. It was the worst feeling ever! I couldn't even stand straight so later my friend had to drop me off at my place! I'm not regretting the fact that I smoked because it to me it felt like a rite of passage. But now that I've tried it, with fatal results, I've decided not to try it ever again.

 

Good choice bro, try and stick with it aye

 

its 9 degrees today
it was so cold

 

Had an evaluation moment of all practical work I've done at college today. I got such compliments about my work, one teacher actually literally said "you're a born graphic designer".

Wow, now for the theoretical exams...

 

Let's see:

High fever, blocked nose, nightmares, hurting throat, muscle pain and bruised ribs from coughing so much. I hate winter.

I want to go home, I want to sit on my parents' couch, watch a lame christmas movie between little christmas lights, and smell the good smells from my momma's kitchen. But by the time I'll be there, all the christmas lights will be gone and everyone is back at work.

 

im going to have to study extremly hard for my Religion test

 

Marj: Awww. =[

Feel better.