Got Something You Want To Let Out Part 2

What are the complications, if you don't mind saying?

 

Uhmmm....

For one....she considers me to her "best friend". Since other people have betrayed her before, she doesn't want to be in another relationship.
She likes someone else.
Her parents object her hanging around too much with boys.
They are very strict and she's kinda "afraid" of them.
etc. etc. etc.

 

thanks everyone for caring..I really appreciate it [even though we're just forum-friends+probably I'm never going to meet you face-to-face :-/ ]
Maverik, you didn't sound mean at all! You spoke in a rational way, very true indeed. Fortunately, I'm thinking that way, too.

 

People that drive and talk on cell phones at the same time annoy me. Its called buy a damn head set or some other hands free device stupid.

 

As do I.

Thanks to everyone who listened to me bitch and moan about this.. you all really helped, thanks.

 

You just have to persevere, pretty much, but at the same time you have to be a little bit realistic. You never know though.

 

I'm currently being hit on by someone who's told me things in the past like "You look like Sarah Silverman, except she's way hotter".
Lulz..... no. Just no.

 

That's always a tremendous feeling to get old friends back, good for you man.

 

I'm happy for you Derek.

 

As soon as i thought i could have her again
I let you go
You fell away
but i couldnt feel what i did for you for her
i never could

In my mind im still with you
i lay my back against the wall at night
pretending it's her

We can never have it again
Thats what she said
I said 'I've changed
She didnt beleive me
And neither did i
It was all a lie
A lie to get her back

I can never change
Im still doing those stupid little pills
I'm a mess without them
a complete fucking mess

The first thing i've ever wrote about how i feel.
I'm addicted to prescription painkillers, Like alot of people i struggle with it every single day and i hate it.
Topping it all off is the fact i'm still in love with my ex girlfriend and it's hard because she is 23 and seeing a guy who is 16. lol..Don't really know why i'm laughing because it's not so funny.

 

Oh my god oh my god oh my god, what have i done?

 

Why do I always have a bad feeling about everything? I am sick of being paranoid.

 

I promise this is the last time I'll ramble about this for a while.. but I just wanna say that things between me and José are PERFECT now. He treats me so much better than he did before.. he actually seems like he cares now and I can tell in the way he acts. He told me today.. that he was gonna be less of an asshole from now on, and I asked him what made him change.. he said because he realized he really loved me and never wants to hurt me again. Fucking finally.

I was with him tonight and he even invited me to be with him and his friends, instead of blowing me off and hanging out with them instead of me. He actually included me in everything he did, and showed his affection for me constantly. And he's even being considerate of my feelings..

I feel so happy.. okay I'm done rambling about this for now.

 

My parents need to take me out for an eye check up. They keep on ignoring it.

 

I almost got choked to death last night by Daniel. I still have the bruises on my neck.

 

Hunny you have to escape this. Tell the police at the least.

 

I was the one that got arrested for intimidation, I lost the plot last night but I never did once physically harm him. I thought he was going to kill me because the last words that he said to me "I oughta kill you".