Got Something You Want To Let Out Part 2

I agree with Kev. Fly in there like, SUPER DANIEL! There to save the damsel in distress.

But seriously. I think you should. Fuck her boyfriend and what he says. He doesn't deserve anyone.

 

I'm kind of stupidly hurt. I don't know. I thought we'd be friends forever, or at least until college. Do I need the "memory" of friendship and stupid promises, if I feel like crying when I think about it? Sometimes I feel like I'm the only one even trying to make an effort. Sometimes I feel like I'm being ignored. It hurts, and I'm probably being stupid about it.

 

I know the feeling too damn well, Malilove.

 

thanks, honey. I just.. I mean, it's just- ah, fuck.

 

Yeah. Pretty much.

Remember, you wanna talk, you know where i'm at

 

I know <3. Thanks.

 

<33 Anytime.

 

I despise the majority of my clothes in my wardrobe, and yet I can't seem to stop shopping at these stores of mass-produced, cookie-cutter, over-priced nonsense.

If I was given the choice between an American Eagle teeshirt, Hollister Jeans, and Ugg boots (I own all except Hollister jeans, they do not make jeans in fatty sizes [read, anything bigger than a size 11], or a long flowing black skirt, a black sheer shirt with a black bustier underneath, and Victorian boots or patent heels...I would go for the latter outfit.

If given enough money, I would buy steel-boned corsets, mink stoles, long lace gloves, flapper dresses, and my room would be adorned with mirrors and roses.

I prefer to listen to music that would be deemed "epic" nowadays. Something that would have sweeping melodies, whether its in vocals, piano, or a sweet guitar solo (read: Dragonforce)

I don't understand this change, as it's not overtaking my life. As I type this, I have an Aeropostale camisole and hoodie on, with Nautica pajama bottoms, very mass-produced and cookie-cutter and somewhat pricy (the camisole and hoodie not so much, the pajama bottoms, a little).

My Coach purse and Ugg boots sit next to my bed, and yet all I want to do is put on my wool peacoat with fur trim, and love the floral design on it. I never want to leave that jacket.

I want to put on my Victorian style dress I bought for Halloween, have my hair in loose curls, and sit all day with a few bouquets of roses.

Call me a Romantic, call me an enthusiast, but I truly believe this is a past life regression, and it's making my wallet hurt itself. All this money on clothes I should be wearing, and I focus on the things I can't afford, not because they're the next hot thing (which is a reasonable cause for my wallet to be crying), but instead because they are of a time gone by that I was not born in, or perhaps was and miss.

Lord and Lady, this is really starting to bother me now.

 

That's an awesome idea, Kev

Pffft, I wish.

But, by this rant you can probably tell what happened:

YOU DIDN'T DUMP HIM? Are you fucking stupid? Jesus fucking Christ, he treats you like shit, you guys don't even make up yesterday, and you're still all "oh, it was SO good! I'm not going to dump him". Fuck that. I'm not going to be your damn fallback anymore. I've been the most fucking supportive person you could ever hope for, and I still get kicked to the sidewalk in favour of that. When you come to me in a week telling me how much of a fucking sonofabitch he is, I'm just going to say you got what you deserved.

(pardon my French)

 

My girlfriend told me tonight that I need to see a shrink.

I think that's not far from the truth.

 

Made out with girl.
Don't want anything more.
She does.
Ignored advice.
Feel crappy.
Don't deserve sympathy.
*sigh*

 

times a million.

 

Understandable.

 

The German teacher at my school passed away yesterday, I've never seen so many people in tears before, people I see everyday all were crying. Yet I couldn't cry, well, I could but I didn't have to, I would have to have forced it and that would be ridiculous because I have way too much respect for that man.

He was a great man, always optimistic and he had the best sense of humor. I remember the last things I said to him and I'm glad it's not something I regret saying but something I'm proud of.

I still can't believe it, though, he was way too young and one of those people you'd think could live on forever. I still don't realise he's gone and I'll never see him again, it's weird, I can't deal with it.

Mr. Joosen RIP, you'll be missed forever by your family, friends and students.

 

Sorry about that. RIP.

 

Thanks, Dean.

 

Seconded.

 

Thanks, Mali.

You know I'm just being to realise it's actually true. I looked at some pictures of our schooltrip in Prague and I now remember the moments I spent with him.

I remember him giving a long explanation about the buildings, no one but a few were still listening to what he was saying and I'm really glad I did.

I just saw a picture of him in the hallway outside the room I slept in and I remember one of the other students had taken a picture of him, I'm looking at that picture now... Man, I can't believe this.


It's fucked up that I couldn't shed one tear when I was thinking about it in Dutch but I felt blocked some how, yet now I write it down in English it all comes pouring out.....

 

Aww, I'm sorry to hear that Stof.