Got Something You Want To Let Out Part 2

I hate your father.

And I wish you would talk to me.

But most of all. I just wish that your mom would let us be together.

 

Nothing to worry about

 

I'm always the "Nice guy" to all the girls I know and the few girls I have gotten Extremely close with have had boyfriends and the most Recent one I have helped her through situations with her boyfriend for 2 years basically and I started falling for her because she would get away from him and be with me and we would always have the time of our lives. But then back to him..It's like she was Addicted to him and still is..now I know it will never work between us because she always goes back to him. So I'll continue being her friend but I just hate the feeling of being Used..I know she wasn't MAKING me cheer her up but I couldn't help it. I loved her a lot. So many times i always get the bad end of Relationships. and Keep going on because i have my Friends to keep my thoughts off of My constant Girl Failures.

I wish it wasn't so hard to find someone who you can get along with you almost 90% of the time, Like you as much as you do them, have the time if your life with, and make it last

From the great times i have had with Amy (the one that kept going to her old cheating boyfriend) I realize that Waiting for the person who you can have that all the time with...is worth it

 

Aw, man. I'm so sorry. That's just absolutley horrible. I'm sorry that he was cheating on you for that long, and then rubbing it in your face on Christmas. Well, kinda sounds like you're better off though. I'm sorry.

 

Lately I've felt like my friends don't want me around. None of them ever talk to me anymore. The two who do seem like they're slowly becoming agitated with everything I do. It's a horrible feeling.

 

I'm taking a break from the LPA. I just wanted to make this known. I don't want sympathetic posts to this either. It is what it is.

 

This is very close to a situation I am having..

 

I may have to agree.

 

On second thought, I'm not. I just won't be on here as much as am.

 

Please make up your mind girl, I'll do anything for you

What are the chances that she still has feelings for me...?
It was a year ago when she said she did.
But I still have these feelings for her, why should she be different?

But I think she's moved on.
I know she has.

God I'm lonely right now. Friggin' holidays.
God these migraines are killing me...

 

Was that a hint at my phone number? I don't know. Do I care? I like talking to him, he's nice.

And what the hell was she thinking of? Inviting us over, and then ditching us for the new friends in the compound. What the hell? Not defending me when I was being questioned, like a fucking inquisition. Not defending me, when those two bitches decided to subtly call me a racist? What the hell? I'm not like that! She knows that! A friend would have defended me, or at least tried to! And then insulting me by means of religion. Oh, if I'm a muslim, then I can't go around with fake piercings, dyed hair, low-cut tops and whatever else it is that I do! I'm not allowed to drink! I can "only change my religion when I'm 18". If I say I'm an atheist, then stay the fuck out of my way, okay? You can believe whatever you want, I'm not going to say anything to you about it, but there is no need to encroach on my beliefs and try to make me feel bad about it, in that tone.

UGH. Anarchy isn't a religion. They annoy me. I was supposed to stay at her house until the 30th, but we decided to leave early. Early, meaning the 27th. I do have a lot more to say.

 

I fucking hate my uncle sometimes.

I finally get Poppy, my aunt's cat, to eat something, then he comes in screaming like a fucking loon and she runs off to hide again.

 

Fuck.
Guilt.
Extreme levels of guilt right now.

 

.

--


Dean. <3.

 

ok...i've never said it because i know it's stupid...for 5 months i like a guy and he says he likes me back but we have a problem he's so far away...he lives in India...we plan to meet next year but i feel like i can't wait anymore and this is just a dream...am i too stupid for loving someone that i've never met?

 

Fuck! He just practically invited me to party with him and his friends on NY's Eve, but I can't! Damn, damn, damn. What a pity, what a shame.

 

I become cynical.

 

I have phantom-limbs, specifically wings. And they are the coolest fucking things in the world.

 

My last girlfriend texted me earlier tonight as I was heading over to my friend's house to a party. I'm so fed up with how she comes back into my life just when I think she's completely out of it. But I should've expected it, I guess. Every time I mention her as part of a story, she tries to contact me. And earlier today, my best friend and I were talking about something and her name came up, and I also deleted her from his phone. Ironic. But I told her I'd text her some time. So maybe things will be okay after all.

 

Fuck. Fuck. FUCK.

I've turned into my mother and I never even knew until tonight.

I had a 23 year old brother. Well...I would have had a 23 year old brother.

My mother had gotten pregnant at 16 by her first husband who was 4 years older than her when they were dating.

She never told her mother.

And she regrets it to this day.










Oh fuck. She aborted a baby boy and never told her mother. Oh fuck. Oh fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck. I've turned into my mother.

Fuck. Fuck.