The Advice Thread (formerly GSYWTLO)

Discussion in 'Serious Chat' started by Derek, Dec 5, 2009.

  1. Theazninvasion68

    Theazninvasion68 It's like blood to a vampire, our tragic desire. LPA Super VIP

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    :hug: It's tough to have no one. But people won't come to you. Oddly, I know it's tough to get out also.. :/ just keep hanging in there!

    Also, Insigifigant? Please Aisha. It isn't in the grand scheme of things. It isn't the big things you do. It's the little things you do. Surly, we all have one or two big things about us. But it isn't what we're all about. It's all the little things we do that add up to something larger than us :)
     
  2. aki*lp

    aki*lp LPA Super Member LPA Super Member

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    I tried talking to my sister who told me to kindly grow up and fuck off. Only because I can't stand my mom comparing me to her.
     
  3. Luke

    Luke Mind Your Manners. LPA Addicted VIP

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    It's true what Rob said, people wont just come to you. You've gotta put yourself out there Aisha...I know it's tough but eventually you'll meet people who appreciate your qualities. You're a nice person from what I've seen and I think this insignificant status you're giving yourself is unfounded.

    I'm actually in a posistion where I don't really have anyone to talk to because all my friends are back home in London. I'm a kind of shy person so I know it's hard to just make friends but at the end of the day you've gotta look at the glass half full, not half empty. If you go into something feeling bad you're only gonna get bad results whereas you're much more likely to have success meeting people and gaining new friends if you have a positive attitude. You hang in there Aisha...us people in different time zones might not be at your location but we're here to talk to any time.

    Chin up. :hug: :)
     
    Last edited: Feb 12, 2010
  4. aki*lp

    aki*lp LPA Super Member LPA Super Member

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    Thanks, it means a lot to me. :hug:
     
  5. Theazninvasion68

    Theazninvasion68 It's like blood to a vampire, our tragic desire. LPA Super VIP

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    :hug:
     
  6. Jesse

    Jesse Out of the abyss. LPA Über VIP

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    Anyone know the best way to just move, get up and go with the least things money/car/etc is?
     
  7. Arlene

    Arlene Oh what tangled webs we weave LPA Super Member

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    Start with a job, Jesse. :)
     
  8. Jesse

    Jesse Out of the abyss. LPA Über VIP

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    Thanks Arlene :)

    But I was just referring to , you know drifting.

    a little adventure... meet people, travel.. But you're right a job is the first step to saving up the money
    :lol:
     
  9. aki*lp

    aki*lp LPA Super Member LPA Super Member

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    Sometimes, I get suicidal.
     
  10. Arlene

    Arlene Oh what tangled webs we weave LPA Super Member

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    :lol: I know you wanna do the whole drifting around thing, but that's just hard to do without any money, hence my "get a job," haha

    Aisha: Why are you so depressed?
     
  11. aki*lp

    aki*lp LPA Super Member LPA Super Member

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    It's my mother. She suffocates me.
     
  12. Arlene

    Arlene Oh what tangled webs we weave LPA Super Member

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    :( I'm sorry. That sucks. Sometimes parents are a bit too much, but it's something for you to work through, right?

    edit: Hmm, that came out wrong. My dad was distracting me while I was replying.
    What I mean is that, I know it's difficult but life is always full of challenges that you just have to push through. And you ARE strong enough to push through it, Aisha. You need to stop putting yourself down and try to be positive. I mean, I could let myself be put down about my poppy being in such bad shape, my uncle most likely having cancer, my mother with all of her emotional issues and my dad not caring about it, being afraid my brother is entering a bad marriage, my sister a bad relationship, my only relationships being: cheated on and used... yknow, and so on. But I just don't let myself come down from it all. It's not good to dwell. Just try to chin up and don't be sad darling. :hug:
     
    Last edited: Feb 13, 2010
  13. Jesse

    Jesse Out of the abyss. LPA Über VIP

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    Yeah, I know. I applied at best buy but I can't call them. I don't have a phone and my mom won't let me use hers...
    I guess I should apply at Barnes & Noble too

    I'm sorry to hear that. :(
     
  14. aki*lp

    aki*lp LPA Super Member LPA Super Member

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    The thing is I have told my other friends about my problems concerning her, and whatever they said didn't hurt me. Until I talked to my aunt who said the same things that they did. And it really really hurt. :cry:
     
  15. Arlene

    Arlene Oh what tangled webs we weave LPA Super Member

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    What do you mean?

    And I just edited my post above, before I saw your reply

    Jesse: Why won't she let you use her phone? Seems oddly selfish and stupid.
     
  16. Jesse

    Jesse Out of the abyss. LPA Über VIP

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    She says that I should have my own phone..
    Though how to achieve that without a job I don't know.
    It is oddly selfish and stupid, she doesn't like her number out there either..
    So it's hard to put phone numbers on applications, sometimes.. :lol:
     
  17. Anya

    Anya Lost LPA Super VIP

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    This is going to be a bit long.. I just need to get it off my chest really lol


    So I've been with my boyfriend David for almost 7 months now. I've known him for 5 years, we dated in High School and he broke up with me because I was pretty immature at the time lol. But this past year we got back together and I'm very happy with him. He's probably the best boyfriend I've ever had. Just that also scares me..? I texted him earlier telling him all that I had felt because I've been holding it in for so long. I'm not too good with expressing emotions that I feel are embarrassing to me until I absolutely feel the need to because I'm about to burst until I do so. I was texting him earlier and was TRYING to flirt with him and be sweet, but he just kept making jokes.. because his favorite thing to do is get a rise out of me. It's his sense of humor, I love his sense of humor it just bothers me only when I want to be sort of romantic and sweet. So I told him I was feeling insecure in our relationship.. and he asked me why. I said "I don't know I think I'm just to the point in our relationship where I'm feeling a bit insecure about a lot of things. Sometimes I worry you've lost interest in me because of small things like you don't flirt with me as much over the phone like we used to in the beginning of our relationship. I will get over it, I just worry. And when I say something makes me mad I don't know how to show you I'm serious, most of the time you just think I'm joking which is partly my fault because I do jokingly get mad at you a lot, but I'm trying to work on that.. I don't know why I feel this way, I'm just bad with expressing my feelings."



    Here's the rest of our conversation:


    David: "What are you insecure about? I'm happy and at least I know you're not. I joke like that all the time, but it's the way I am I'm sorry it bothers you. I don't know if you realize how much work I put into our relationship and you being upset over my outlet is like docking someone's pay because they don't work every day of every month of every year."

    Me: "I honestly don't know, I just needed to talk to you about it. I don't want you to be mad with me. I think its just I have never really been in a relationship that I truly cared about keeping until I met you. And I am SO happy. I love when you joke, I love your sense of humor.. I just get these small worries that turn into big worries and it's bothering me a lot."

    David: "You still haven't actually answered my question of what you're concerned, worried, insecure about."

    Me: "For some reason i don't know why.. I look at your past girlfriends like Kelsey for instance, and worry you won't want to deal with the long distance thing (we live two hours apart btw) like you did with her, and then leave me. Please don't think I'm stupid or anything."



    And then right after I sent that he let me know his phone was dying and he would have to call me after he got off work.. i just want someone to read this and see if they understand why I feel this way. =/ I thought about it and I guess maybe I am being ridiculous, and I don't know if I'm expecting him to agree with me.. just I want him to understand that I have feelings and to listen is all. Which I guess he did.. I do feel a little better telling him how I felt.
     
  18. Derek

    Derek LPAssociation.com Administrator LPA Administrator

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    You're right to feel that way. Hopefully he understands *HUG*. Keep us posted.
     
  19. hybridsoldier1989

    hybridsoldier1989 strange things are afoot at the circle k

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    After reading through the entire post, I can say that I don't believe you are being ridiculous. I studied insecurity for a research project last year in psychology and the long distance and phone-call relationship is something that I have personally done. With strains such as long distance, a couple needs to get past the way they'd act normally. What I mean is that your boyfriend should be able to hear you out about the jokes and be able to put your opinion into cosnideration and stop it for now. Especially if it really is bothering you. Communication of feelings and sharing your thoughts with him is the most important thing you can do in a long-distance relationship. You did nothing wtrong by confessing this to him. I suggest you talk extensively with him about this. Nobody deserves to feel insecure in a relationship and it is his job to make you feel better. I hope this helps a little bit. Don't feel ridiculous because you told him how you feel, bottling emotions up for long periods of time could be potentially damaging to your relationship. Good luck.
     
  20. Anya

    Anya Lost LPA Super VIP

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    Thank you. <3 I'm honestly sure we can work through this, at the moment I think maybe he's just a little hurt because he thinks I may not be happy with him. I'm sure that when he calls, we're both going to apologize and talk it through.. that's usually how it goes. I think I am just strained because of the whole long distance thing. When he's here were PERFECT. Unbelievably happy couple.. but when he leaves that's when the insecurity sinks in. The doubts that maybe he'll leave me and find someone else, that sort of thing. I don't think he needs to stop with his sense of humor, it's what I love about him.. just when I want him to tone it down he doesn't. I'm going to try and talk to him about it.
     

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