S17 When I walk on bridges The water doesn't seem far down And down from heights there is no swimming Cause I only want to drown I wonder why you had sought me When we hadn't spoke in years And didn't you notice that I was still choking From the salt of all my tears? I use to count the reasons to live, to rise like a dawning sun but now when I try to find the reasons I can not even think of one Why'd you say I was special to you When all you've done is leave? And why did you reach out to me When you knew you'd make me bleed? You said you couldn't choose - Between a lover and a friend But you don't mind the loss At least not in the end And now that you're happy You feel that your life is like a song A rainbow formed in the evening dew a cloud you float among By now this torment should have withered, died But still it lingers, beckons lies I can feel its pulsing, a squalling wry And when you said that you were confused I've always wondered What's so confusing about my love for you? In love, you had tossed aside a true friend And in love, you had broke my heart again And it really makes it hard to stomach To see everything he has, When it's all I've ever wanted I see you leap and jump up mountains while I just fall from cliffs and in your felicity I find loneliness So why'd you come along When my life was already crumbling And why'd you make me feel That I might be worth something Just turn your back, and declare I've meant nothing You know that you had caught me When I was in mid fall You were the light surrounding Illuming on my walls I needed a savior, not a ticking bomb I needed a lover, not a farewell song There will never be another Girl that I could care for more And I had felt a heat in winter A memory that I adore My time is too short, I will not love again There will be no one else, none that understand I can't express my feelings, "I love you"'s not enough There a heat inside my core, that burns deeper than any lust I wonder if a knife will erase all the pain I wonder if the sky, will shower me with rain Remember that I loved you, until my life's very end Know that I will never, ever love again Cause now when I sleep, these pills will leave no scar Not when I've no dreams, no hopes, When I'm just a fading star I wonder why you had sought me When we hadn't spoke in years And didn't you notice that I was still choking From the weight of all my tears? When I walk on bridges The water doesn't seem far down And down from heights there is no swimming Cause I've just begun to drown - JMB