They build a raft and then they sailed Looking for heaven and coming out in hell The winters' cove where there's burried men Frozen under earth and a chilled wind They build raft and then they sunk Scorn from the mistakes that they've made Mankind's image of wax and flames When candles lit and no warmth came There they swore to haunt my grave Dreams of memories that won't decay Here a broken spell of mad Hear, they voices of the dead Under moonlight there's a orange eyed child The harvest song sung so vile There I sat under the phantom sun Where I found a raft and my nightmares begun... A laugh, a scream, a flag layed down The knife, the blood, a crimson crown The queens debt to the fray Under wood, moss, she decays
Very descriptive. I like it. And the rythme goes well. Except on line 11 and 12. It seems.. odd. otherwise, pretty good
They build raft and then they sunk Scorn from the mistakes that they've made is more odd than line 11 and 12 but thank you I would have liked to to be more visually descriptive though..