Jokes!

Discussion in 'Random Chat' started by aki*lp, Mar 11, 2005.

  1. #1
    aki*lp

    aki*lp LPA Super Member LPA Super Member

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    We all need a laugh,and if you have a joke lend it here....you can be the source of ones smile....so go on and make us(members of the lpa) laugh at whatever you have in store ^_^
     
  2. #2
    Neil

    Neil Super Duper Member LPA Super Member

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    There's another older thread like this, so I don't know if this will get closed.


    What do you call a penguin in the desert?
























    Lost. :lol:
     
  3. #3
    DiSiLLUSiON

    DiSiLLUSiON Ambient

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    There's a green old bycicle tyre and a red firetruck department shoelace walking on the northpole.. suddenly, the green old bycicle tyre says to the red firetruck department shoelace: 'do you know why it's so cold?' when the red firetruck department shoelace suddenly replies to the green old bycicle tyre: 'dunno'.








    hahahahaha!1!!1!112!



    neh, just kidding. don't have any good jokes, spontaneous jokes are funnier :D
     
  4. #4
    Chris

    Chris LPA Addict LPA Addict

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    Its summer and there 2 trees in the park. So the tree says to the other tree: "Pretty hot isnt it?". The other freaks out and screams: "OH MY GOD!!! A TALKING TREE".




    Yes i like the joke :lol:
     
  5. #5
    Tomi

    Tomi   LPA Addict

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    Whats the similarity between Michael Jackson and a video game console?

    highlight // they both get turned on by children. //
     
  6. #6
    aki*lp

    aki*lp LPA Super Member LPA Super Member

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    :lol: haha
     
  7. #7
    Perla

    Perla Give 'Em Hell Kid

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    :lol:

    Two cows talking in the field. One says: This Mad Cow disease thing is affecting everyone. It sounds pretty scary, huh? The other one reponds: I don't care I'm a sheep, beee! :wth:

    @Chris- :D
     
  8. #8
    Mechanical Christ

    Mechanical Christ Ein heißer Schrei LPA Super Member

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    If your panty lines can be seen from a aerial photograph....you might be a redneck.

    If 401 is your mother in law's bra siz....you might be a redneck.

    If you thought the last four words of the Star Spangled Banner were "Gentlemen start your engines" ....you might be a redneck.

    If your honeymoon was featured on "True Stories of the Highway Patrol" ....you might be a redneck.

    If you've ever had your nipple bitten off by a beaver ....you might be a redneck.
     
  9. #9
    Chris Luke

    Chris Luke LPA Super Member LPA Super Member

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    The teacher asked her students to use the word 'fascinate' in a sentence. Mary said, "My family went to the New York City Zoo, and we saw all the animals. It was fascinating." The teacher said, "That was good, but I wanted the word 'fascinate'." Sally raised her hand. She said, "My family went to the Philadelphia Zoo and saw the animals. I was fascinated." The teacher said, "Good, but I wanted the word 'fascinate'." Little Johnny Siebert raised his hand. The teacher hesitated because Johnny was noted for his bad language. She finally decided there was no way he could damage the word 'fascinate' so she called on him. Johnny Seibert said, "My sister has a sweater with 10 buttons, but her boobs are so big she can only fasten eight."
     
  10. #10
    Theazninvasion68

    Theazninvasion68 It's like blood to a vampire, our tragic desire. LPA Super VIP

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    whats a waffle thats brown?

    a pancake
     
  11. #11
    Neil

    Neil Super Duper Member LPA Super Member

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    More like.. a Canadian

    *rubs nipple*

    Damn beavers :lol:
     
  12. #12
    Tomi

    Tomi   LPA Addict

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    :lol: :lol: :lol:
    That kid is sure creative.

    ---

    A cop stopped me for speeding. He said, "Why were you going so fast?" I said, "See this thing my foot is on? It's called an accelerator. When you push down on it, it sends more gas to the engine. The whole car just takes right off. And see this thing? This steers it."
    <div align=right>-- Steven Wright</div>
     
  13. #13
    aki*lp

    aki*lp LPA Super Member LPA Super Member

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    :lol:
     
  14. #14
    aki*lp

    aki*lp LPA Super Member LPA Super Member

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    :lol: !!!
     
  15. #15
    aki*lp

    aki*lp LPA Super Member LPA Super Member

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    Corny I know but my little cousin told me this one:
    what forms when a porcupine collides with a lamp post?






















    a tooth brush
     

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