Discussion in 'Serious Chat' started by Todd, Apr 2, 2007.
Did you even read my post? I don't know that he raped a girl, I don't know what happened.
I'm going to have to respectfully disagree.
One of my best friends is a convicted felon, and he's one of the few guys in the world that I trust.
Let him choose his own company. If a friend is going to be insulted on who you think is a good person, then he isn't that great of a friend.
I mean, LP's free to make his own decisions, and if his friend can't respect that, then obviously that friend doesn't respect his judgment.
I know, LP is the one who chooses with everyone that he wants to go out, no problem. But his friends was only worry for his safety so he isn't wrong either, but yeah LP can do whatever he wants, it's his life.
It's not that my friend is worrying for my safety, it's just he's never liked the guy through high school and now that he's out of jail and has a sex offender label over his head gives my friend even more of a reason to hate the guy. Not once during the argument with me and my friend did he bring up he was worried about my safety.
If this would have been a case where I didn't know the guy..AT ALL...and he was a sex offender then I wouldn't be around him. But I know the guys parents, and some of his family. Through middle school we were really good friends, hungout on a daily basis and the whole 9 yards. It isn't like I don't know him.
The name is Mike, btw.
ohh then it changes everything, if he had something against the guy before the whole thing then the situation it's easy, i mean he has to understand that you are capable of choosing who do you want in your life and he doesn't have to agree because it's your life.
Exactly what I tried explaining to him, but he felt like I was just talking out of my ass. I tried telling him I'm not gonna put him on my mysapce, have his number and hangout on a daily basis. Friend A has known friend B since grade school, so when I do hangout with friend B it's going to be a group thing. I know I'll never be close with friend B again like we were, simply because we're just different people, but not different enough to chill from time to time, go shoot some pool or shit like that.
Freind C just has an overall problem and as I said, this whole deal with friend B getting locked up and being labeled as a sex offender just gives him another reason to hate. He's only going by the stories he's heard and picking the worst one out and stickin with it. I've heard 3 or 4 different stories, so since I don't know which one is true I'm not going to take any of them because obviously only one of them are right and I don't want to wrongfully accuse and assume shit, so I'm just going by the way he is now, not what he may or may not have done.
I'm the type that doesn't really care what others will think. I'll wear a pair of pants for a week or so and not care, as long as they aren't filthy, lol. I like what I like and that's it. Friend C was saying people will look at me oddly or whatever and look down on me for being around a registered sex offender, which is bullshit. The guy has a fience' for christs sakes so obviously there are some people who don't mind being around the guy.
I've been doing my best to keep her from stressing out and such, so hopefully that helps.
Mike, it seems that you need to just make your own decisions. Friend C just sounds like an ass hole, frankly. If you want to hang out with that guy, even if he has a possible rape charge hanging over his head, if you think he's a nice guy, he's pleasant with you, and you have a good time hanging out with him, don't let it get in the way of your friendship. Tell friend C that you can be friends with whoever the hell you want, if he thinks it's that big of a deal. Plus, as you said, it would be a group thing, so I don't think he would end up, I dunno, getting you into any sort of trouble, especially if friend A is there. I mean, maybe friend C is right and friend B is someone to avoid, but you need to make that decision for yourself. Find out for yourself. If he turns out to be a freaky pedophile, don't hang out with him, but give him the benefit of doubt until you know for sure.
Just what I think.
Life is really sucking, I think I should take some time off the computer. I need to work on my socialism skills. They're not that good. Even though I have been hanging out with some friends lately, I don't know it's like all some of them want to do is just drink and to do drugs and others are moving on with life, progressing, getting married, and are just too busy. I feel I'm being left behind, and that I can't catch my breath. I try to make new friends but most people call me an asshole for being blunt. Is it my fault that obesce people ask me if they are fat and I tell them the truth? That I'm not attracted to them. Is it so wrong to ask someone if it's alright if we can just be friends? Should I change for the sake of the people around me? I think I just need a new start, a new town, a new home. I don't want to change who I am but I want to change the events that happen around me. I need to get a life that'll actually progress. I just don't know how to.
Jesse, I went through and am still going through the back end of the same thing you are. It seems that everyone just wants to go out and get pissed etc. like whenever they can. Sometimes it's like I wanna blame them for changing so much but then there's the realisation that I'm the problem because I didn't change. But to be perfectly honest I'd rather remain the same person I am because I guaruntee that all these changes people are going through are just phases. Eventually everything will mellow out (like it's doing in my case slowly but surely) and things will seem slightly less chaotic. The problem is though is that you can't force people to not change. Everyone's gotta find themselves by themselves.
The thing that annoys me most of all is that people use the excuse ''well you're only young once''. Bollocks. If everyone was to adhear to that then I guess it would be against the law to get drunk over the age of 25.
Thanks to Will and Arlene. Your advice are really helpful! <3
Thanks Luke, It's true that I can't stop them from changing I don't want to really, it's that I don't want to lose friends that I've known since the third grade. I have a really hard time making friends, and losing them is really awful. Yes, that saying of "You're only young once" is also very annoying to me, I lost my best friend and girl friend a few years back for not wanting to do things that I didn't agree with. I'm going to take your advice and just try to make things mellow. When I start college in august I'll be more productive and hopefully then things will start to fall into place.
To be honest, the best thing you can do is just stay true to yourself. By any means, do not change for the sake of making friends. You don't need to change who you are, you just need to find people who like you for who you are. This might not always be easy but you honestly do not seem like the kind of person who wouldn't be able to get friends. You seem nice. Your friends might be going through the same thing you are but are changing themselves in order to fit in.
I have friends who have done drugs, I have friends who get drunk. I choose not to do either and I have never tried either. I don't plan on ever doing drugs and I will wait until I'm 21 to drink. I don't see anything wrong with my choice and I don't approve of their choices but I still talk to them. My only stipulation is that they don't do it around me and if they can't handle that little request then they aren't worth the trouble.
Seriously, don't change to fit in. You will never be comfortable with yourself and that's what really matters.
I need to stop reading too much into things.
*screams at self* Stop freaking the fuck out!
I do the same exact thing. I overthink things and freak myself out. Just try to relax.
That does it! I'm telling my dad to complain about the "drum prodigy" in the next apartment meeting.
College sucks when all your teachers are the head of the department. Damn English and History...
Edit: After coming back to the forums of about 2 years of absence Will is leaving (already left?). I find this odd because when I first joined the forums back in '04 he ended up going on like a 1-2 year leave. I think it's my fault...? But possibly not. Just an odd bit of information for you all.
Totally your fault Duh.
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