1. Vary your vehicle's speed inversely with the speed limit. 2. Roll down your windows and blast talk radio. Attempt to headbang. 3. At stop lights, eye the person in the next car suspiciously. With a look of fear, lock your doors. 4. Two words: Chicken suit. 5. Write the words "Help me" on your back window in red paint. The more it looks like blood, the better. 6. Have conversations, looking periodically at the passenger seat, when driving alone. 7. Laugh a lot. A whole lot. 8. Stop at the green lights. 9. Go at the red ones. 10. Occasionally wave a stuffed animal/troll doll/Barbie out your window or sunroof. Feel free to make it dance. 11. Eat food that requires silverware. 12. Pass cars, then drive very slowly. 13. Sing without having the radio on. 14. Honk frequently without motivation. 15. Wave at people often. If they wave back, offer an angry look and an obscene gesture. 16. Ask people for Grey Poupon. 17. Let pedestrians know who's boss. 18. Look behind you frequently, with a very paranoid look. 19. Restart your car at every stop light. 20. Hang numerous car-fresheners in the rear-view mirror. Talk to them, stroking them lovingly. 21. Lob burning things in the windows of smokers who throw their butts out the window. 22. While stopped at a light, piss out the window/sunroof onto other cars. 23. Paint your car with occult symbols. 24. Keep at least five cats in the car. 25. Have some passengers in the back who are having wild, noisy sex. 26. Root (cheer, not snuffle in the mud) for firetrucks. 27. Stop and collect roadkill. 28. Stop and pray to roadkill. 29. Throw Spam. 30. Get in the fast lane and gradually ... slow ... down ... to a stop. Then get out and watch the cars. Throw Spam at them.
Here's some other good ones... - Go under someone's car in a parking lot. Find the brake light cable. Find the horn relay. Hook up the brake light cable TO the horn relay. Now, every time they step on the brakes, the horn honks. For best results, get the person stopped at a red light... :chemist: -Superglue a magnet to the bottom of a McDonald's drink cup. Stick it on your roof, like where you put it while you're unlocking your door as you leave a fast food joint with your drink still with you (you know what I mean, right?). Drive away with the cup on your roof. People will honk, make crazy hand signs, get out of their car, etc... to tell you about that you forgot to take your drink down... - Great way to shake tailgaters: Wire up a button to your dashboard that turns on your brake lights without applying the brakes. You know when to use this button. -How many times can you switch lanes in one kilometer? There's never been a better time to find out..... - Wire up your back-up lights to the same circuit that the taillights are on, and turn your headlights (therefore your taillights too) on. Watch the person behind you...drives 'em nuts...
I'll try the ones that shake the tailgators. I will open all my windows and blast classic rock when people blast hip-hop.
I saw someone reading while they were driving the other day. And it wasn't like a magazine page, with big thick letters. It was a novel. He planted the book in the steering wheel. I wanted to laugh, just thinking of him smacking into a lightpole.
in singapore i know there's a law that forbids drink driving so here's wat you do -get a can of beer -drink and drive at the same time -then toast the person beside you :rawk:
put a "Let's have a honk-as-much-as-you-can contest" sign with this smiley and start honking non stop