Even the crows will be wearing white

Discussion in 'Your Projects' started by Seinfeld, Aug 11, 2008.

  1. #1
    Seinfeld

    Seinfeld We are the nobodies LPA Super Member

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    Melancholy,
    it matches your eyes
    Kissing your forehead
    I fall into arms, like you
    'cause we both know: I might as well be dead

    Promise me, you'll be wearing white
    Stepping out of the dark
    And even the crows will be wearing...
    Promise me, you'll attend my funeral in white

    Sleepless nights,
    over days of dreaming
    Stroking your hair once more
    I fall out of harm, for you
    'cause we both know: I've fought my battles

    ...and left you this war

    Promise me, you'll be wearing white
    Stepping out of the dark
    And even the crows will be wearing...
    Promise me, you'll attend my funeral in white

    Now promise me, you'll be wearing white
    And I assure you, so will I
    As long as you attend my funeral,
    Even the crows will be wearing white
     
  2. #2
    El Muerto

    El Muerto LPA Super Member LPA Super Member

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    I like the idea and if you re-do it a bit I think it could turn out to be an amazing piece
     
  3. #3
    Seinfeld

    Seinfeld We are the nobodies LPA Super Member

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    Please do elaborate. Maybe some more specific suggestions?
     
  4. #4
    El Muerto

    El Muerto LPA Super Member LPA Super Member

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    Well I can't really explain it but some parts seem kinda odd to me, like those unfinished sentences and some parts like:
    But that's just me, it's more important that you are satisfied with your work :)
     
  5. #5
    Seinfeld

    Seinfeld We are the nobodies LPA Super Member

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    True. But it could've been that it was something technical or something like the structure of certain sentences, that made it seem a little weird. Better ask to be safe than sorry. :)
     

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