Thank you very much <3 I'm hurting the last 4 days and I'm really thankful for your words. Here for each other.
Thanks for your words. I also experienced a lot of people around me passing away the last one and a half years. It's just that for some reasons Chester feels like the hardest experience in this sad series. It will get better but it will take it's time. I am still having a hard time to accept a world without him
Hopefully you are right I haven't dealt with much death if any at all so I'm specially inadecuent to deal with all of this; I'll hold your views close to heart.
@Joh: Chester felt like one of the hardest because during your periods of grief you likely turned to Linkin Park. Some of their songs probably helped you when you were depressed over the losses of your loved ones, and now to have the vocalist of that band gone, you feel like your voice during those times is gone as well. It's understandable, but his music is still there. It always will be.
Just seen the new video release for talking to myself. Made me smile and cry so hard for our loss. Totally awesome video but just brings it home like a slap in the face what has happened. Chester I miss you so very much it hurts all of the time
Just rewatched their youtube video "hard to listen - one more light - linkin park" where Chester sais "... it makes you wanna fucking cry ... that's why that song is great ... it's fucking hard to listen to... "... gave me a little smile...
Seeing how all the LP Fans are sticking together and supporting each other, brightened my day by alot.
It really does, all the time. Almost a month and I still can't get over it cause everytime when I'm alright for two days, on the third day something happens that literally kills me inside and all recovery is gone. Still asking myself how I should be strong and how I should stand tall when not even my hero could. I'm never as strong as he was. And if that sounds bad, don't worry - I'm not suicidal.
Right. I could only watch the Videos a few times in the last weeks. At some point it becomes too much for me. Especially when Chester is singing. Hope it will be better sometime. Always goes up and down. I am glad the LP community holds together.
@Lynn really glad to hear that you are not suicidal. I can relate to the doing okay for a few days and then something drags you back. I still ask myself why I should be strong when even chester couldn't. I do have a lot of suicidal thoughts still and know they will be here for a while yet but I am able to ask them to whisper instead of shout at me now, which I guess is progress
There is nothing wrong with thinking you can be stronger than he was in his last moments. Do you feel how carrying on his legacy and positive impacts on our lives makes us stronger than we were before? This influence is not bound to a living person, it is on our minds.
Man, every time I see people open up about their struggles and their emotions since this tragedy and see more people respond to them with "you're not alone, things will get better, I'm here for you, etc.", the more it reminds me of how I get people telling me the same things when I open up, but it actually makes me feel worse for some reason. Literally nothing calms me down or makes me feel better. No matter how many times I talk to my counselor, no matter how often I exercise to relieve stress, no matter how many obstacles I overcome without realizing it until years later, no matter how much closer I get to my life goals, no matter many times people reassure to me that things will get better or that I'm not alone, I just continue to feel worse and feel even more isolated. At this rate, I'm slowly beginning to worry if I may start having suicidal thoughts when I'm in my 40's and 50's. If Chester, Chris Cornell, and Robin Williams couldn't overcome their trauma despite all the success they had, how the hell am I going to get through the shit I'm dealing with and have dealt with for my whole life? I feel like nothing in my life has changed since I was a little kid. Literally nothing helps me, which makes me very alarmed. I don't trust any hotlines either, because they're all full of fucking assholes who don't truly give a shit. I guess I all I can do is fight this shit on my own and hope for the best.
Yeah sometimes I feel it making me strong but other days I just barely know how to keep going. Feeling lost in this world knowing he isn't there anymore. Knowing he couldn't be strong ... Already 4 weeks today. Together we'll keep fighting @Carla You're strong too and yeah it's indeed progress to even try to silence your thoughts. I know together we'll make it possible. Just talk and find the right way between confrontation and distance.
I am at the gym right now and LP came on the radio....some of his lyrics are extra haunting now :/ but I have myself a good workout to it. I was watching a interview from a few months ago with Chester and Mike and the way Chester was talking about his depression reminds me of one of my friends who battles with clinical depression which concerns me that eventually she will do the same thing. Sept 2nd we will be having a huge memorial for Chester out in Vegas. I am gonna go but not sure if I am ready.
We have to right now. This was a tragedy that nobody ever planned for, or even anticipated could ever be a reality for Chester. Despite his honesty in having a horrible 2016, to all of us (even some of his closest friends) we felt he was past it and on his way to recovery. It came as a shock to everyone, and the last thing we can do as fans is grow apart and let things crumble. As @Dekar said, carrying on his legacy ensures that he will always be honored.
Sorry if my message came across as a bit "ignorant". That wasn't my intention. It's just amazing how healing it can be to read other people's comment.