I was thinking of this today, it just hit me!I was thinking of a song that would represent my father, I hate him, long story really......He really p*ssed me off yesterday, which inspired me to write this. Yesterday, we went to the doctor, and after a while we were done so we left. I felt like sh*t, I just wanted to go home, I was about to barf practically, but then my dad says "We gotta go out to eat i'm staaarving" but I'm like, "No please I gotta go home and collapse I feel like crap, please no.." and he's like, "Stop complaining, were going" and i'm like, "So, food is more important than your own DAUGHTER now?!" and he's like, "Yes it is, i'm getting p*ssed of at you, now stop!" I can't believe he said that he's so rude you don't say that to your daughter or son or anything...He says stuff like this all the time. So I kept silent and I was so p*ssed of I started thinking of a mean lyric about him, but he'll never know it was about him really because I never even meantioned his name in the song HA!but I was lying down and suddenly I started singing to somthing I had simply made up in my head. Imediatly I wanted to post this on here lol, I think it's the best i've ever done in my life. So I sat here and typed up the rest, and it only took me an hour just now!I'm suprised I never thought I could make a song like this in so little time. I guess, I just already knew what I wanted to write about. Read and review if you can, i'm quite proud of this one. If that sounds too cocky, I don't mean to be.... Verse #1 Hello how are you, I say, that's just a lie, secretly telling, you, to get away, Pre-Chorus: My mind slips, as I fall, deep, underwater, My life falls, before me, and it's falling even farther... Chorus: You don't even notice me, I find myself trying to be, Someone else, All these thoughts in my mind, start to wither and die, I'm giving up myself, My mind blanks, It shuts down, remember, that your the one who caused this, Your words, Spitting with hate, I just wanna curl up, and just die here.... Verse #2 Hello how are you, I say, Don't you realize, I want you, farther away, Pre-Chorus: Even though these words, to you, mean nothing, as long as i'm here, and i'm meant for somthing.... Chorus Repeat: You don't even notice me, I find myself trying to be, Someone else, All these thoughts in my mind, start to wither and die, I'm giving up myself, My mind blanks, It shuts down, remember, that your the one who caused this, Your words, Spitting with hate, I just wanna curl up, and die here.... Bridge: Everyday, I want this to be the end, but it's only the beginning, I can't stop all these feelings, when your standing right there! Chorus Repeat: You don't even notice me, I find myself trying to be, Someone else, All these thoughts in my mind, start to wither and die, I'm giving up myself, Your empty heart, Never fullfilled mine, all of this anger, Kept Inside, Allthough, your hopeless to remember, all the pain, that caused this, Your stare, burns through my own, I just wanna curl up, and die here.... Fade: (and die here) (and die here) (and die here) (fades) ----------------- Sooo.....Is it good?I know the fading part may sound stupid, but I wanted to make it a TRUE song lol. I even know how the song will sound allready, I think I did pretty good, i'm amazed...I really wrote this, but I never really thought I could write somthing like this before.
hey buddy! yeah, I really like it... I understand where you are coming from... having a dad that sometimes doesn't like you... but back to your song, I really think you did a good job, I'd like to hear it as a song... hmmm, that would be pretty kickass. GOOD JOB!
Hey! I decided to comment on your song since you took your time to look over mine I think it's very well written, you displayed your emotions. You're in a tough situation with your dad. I guess I lucked out, I have seemingly perfect parents. I especially liked the chorus of your song. Keep it up!
i really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really like it. really.
hey!!!!!! I liked this songs, and I hope, you and your father will live in peace PS I know person, who loves food more than everything and this is very sad
I doubt my dad and I will ever live at peace he's done too much for me to ever forgive him...but i'm not gonna say it's kinda personal, but thankyou anyways *laughs at RiverJudeAlexander* Thanks for your outburst of support! That must've taken a long time to write