Hi everyone, This is my first poem that I'm posting here on LP Association. It's basically two versions of the same idea.... I'd really appreciate feedback ALONE I Alone In my own world Of me and my thoughts Swirling around in flourescent patterns That zing and spark On the fringes of my consciousness Trying to gain entry And invade me Never letting me rest in peace But demanding full and complete attention - The image of you ALONE II Alone And on my own Thoughts wander unchecked through The folds of my mind Roaming on the plains of imagination Creeping through the valley of Secret desires Where they grow and take on shape Feed on the fuel of my wishes And so they become true For me For a little while at least
wow.. welcome!! heehee.. i made u join.. haha.. anywho dude, i never knew how great you are with poetry!! seriously.. thats really good stuff. personally, i liked ALONE II better.. but how bout you just have one longer poem called "ALONE" like you could put those two stanza's together to make a poem.. bcos it sorta has a link to what the poem is about.. but dude.. its good!! keep it up yar?? heeeheee..^^
Nice work Karen . I'm glad you joined these forums! It's always nice to have talented writers on these forums.
Thanx Piano Paperkut and Derek for the nice compliments. BTW, I actually tried to make the two poems into one but they didn't seem to work so that's why it sorta split into two poems...... I like Alone II better as well....