Wrote this several times but this is the finished version. Im so depressed now I just wanted to post it here. Everytime I Get Close Following me, more painful everyday This image I've tried to escape Watching over, every step of the way Finding nothing but mistakes Within every question I'm becoming even more lost Cause nothing ever turns out to be what I always thought How am I suppose to make it through this on my own If the only thing I know to do is what I've been shown? Everytime I get close I let go of what's in front of me (Proving to myself that I'm just too weak) Everytime I get close I end up letting go of everything (Cause I'm always messing things up for me) Here I am slowly dying inside Beyond the point in which time heals Revealing what's left of the pride Just for every ounce to be concealed And as I look up the truth is starring back at me Knowing I'll never be able to accept what I see Cause just when I think I can turn to myself for the answer I find my own dependence will only bring to me failure Everytime I get close I let go of what's in front of me (Proving to myself that I'm just too weak) Everytime I get close I end up letting go of everything (Cause I'm always messing things up for me) Even though I've made it this far Inside I'm still so lost and scarred I cannot ####### go through with this It's just too much to be pushed against There's just so much about me That I wish I could change Everytime I get close I let go of what's in front of me (Proving to myself that I'm just too weak) Everytime I get close I end up letting go of everything... Everytime I get close I let go of what's in front of me (Proving to myself that I'm just too weak) Everytime I get close I end up letting go of everything (Cause I'm always messing things up for me)
Scars To Hide So I try to cover up these scars and the choices I've made But it's clear the only thing that seems to help is this blade And I try to look away but it's consuming my every thought It's all I can think about / living in the fear of being caught Replacing every scar with an open wound to medicate Myself from the problems that always seem to create I'll ease the pain with every cut until I can feel some relief Because the only way to heal me is to open these wounds I'll medicate myself from the pain that I've kept down inside Knowing there won't always be room for these scars to hide I try to make myself stop but I fall into the blades comfort Because within all of it's pain is the relief from all the hurt And it's clear that I can't control myself I'm just too afraid Because it's the only way that from this pain I can evade And although tommorow it will show all over my arms, The relief is worth each and every one of these scars I'll ease the pain with every cut until I can feel some relief Because the only way to heal me is to open these wounds I'll medicate myself from the pain that I've kept down inside Knowing there won't always be room for these scars to hide I tried to hide this from the world but I just couldn't conceal it all I tried to hide this from everyone and now I'm left with every flaw There's another.
Everything You Feel Deception strengthens the voice As she distorts the picture as if it was her own Sharing what's never been seen Just a fake inside her twisted little mind And somewhere in the distance lies for her to see That life will never be what she has made it out to be I never know If I should trust Or take everything as a lie Because I'm so use to the way You fake everything you feel inside Deception defines another choice As she convinces herself that she's not alone Spreading what will never be seen Just a glimps of what she's chosen to deny And somewhere in the distance lies for her to see That life will never be as bad as she wants it to be I never know If I should trust Or take everything as a lie Because I'm so use to the way You fake everything you feel inside And another.