Man Caught Having Sex With His Bike This is the fucking wierdest thing I've ever heard of. I'd like to make it known that 99.999999999999% of Scots do not engage in sexual relations with their bicycles.
Let me get this straight: He was caught fuckin' a bike in his own home and now he's on probation for it? I can't imagine what other things people are bangin' in their spare time that they're not getting caught for.
Oh. I missed that part. Either way, I still can't fathom what other things people are trying to bang in their spare time.
If sex with the same gender is homosexuality, and sex with an animal is beastiality. ...what is bike sex called?
Does it really constitute putting him on the sex offenders register though? I mean, it's not as if he's a paedophile or a rapist.
I want to hear him try to explain why he did it. "That bike should have known better with its sexy tassels, and that skimpy looking seat. I couldn't help myself!"
Maybe they're scared, he'll attempt having sex with some little kids bike? Look out kids! Here comes the bikefucker! I guess Bikegangs don't look so hot now Well, for the bikefucker they might.
I know someone who dry humps their bike. I tend to leave the area as fast as possible when they do so.