Got Something You Want To Let Out Part 2

Though I know it'll be hard to get over it.




@ Minus Xero-

Just saw your last post. That sucks .


And Even I want a boyfriend.

 

I am bisexual, and quite fucking proud of it.

I do not listen when you say I am an abomination. I laugh in your face when you tell me I just don't want to admit I'm a lesbian.

I smirk when you tell me it's a phase, or that I'm doing it to be cool.

And I giggle when you tell me that if you were my boyfriend, you'd be pissed and leave me.

My man ACCEPTS me for who I am, and you are just uncomfortable with the fact that I am so comfortable with MY sexuality that I flaunt it. I wear it like a badge of honor. I AM FUCKING BISEXUAL.

You just wish you could get the hot ass guys AND girls I do :]

 

Maybe that's what attracted Jay to you .


No, really though, that's awesome and not everyone can do that.

 

confused..my life is at a awkward place

i found out someone likes me..possibly
and SHE is still with him trying to be my friend..fuck that
and im possibly moving
or not

GAH

 

I really can't handle another piece of bad news. I'm a mentally strong person but even I have my limits.

@Rachel: Good for you.

To be honest I'd love a bisexual girlfriend. Jay's a lucky guy.

 

I just wish she would talk to me!!! What the fuck did I do that was so wrong?!?!? I don't deserve this...

 

Wow, this is weird. I actually won't get to see her for a month...

 

My first crush is my first love. I've known her since elementary school and in middle school she was the one for me. My first unconditional love. I never had the guts to tell her back then. I was happy just being around her. Better than the funniest jokes, better than any drug I've ever taken.

After middle school we parted ways, but promised to keep in touch. We have. We've seen each other 5 times in the last 6-7 years, but we always talk online. We never lost contact.

And my love for her never died. I was the first one to like her, apparently. Because in high school, everyone was telling me about how she "got hot."

But to me she was always beautiful. The prettiest, most attractive person I've ever met.

We talk about a lot of things. I've come out and told her that she was my first crush. In my opinion, my most important crush. I've been very open about it. I told her, "if I were to ever have a chance with you, at any cost, I would take it in a heartbeat." She told me how special I make her feel. Never that she reciprocates any of these feelings. But I don't care. I love her. I love her.

Last night, as my birthday was coming to a close, and I fell asleep, I had a dream. About her. Of her telling me that she liked me, that we should get together. It was the realest dream I've ever had. Nothing was surreal. It felt like real life. The butterflies in my stomach, the warmth of her lips when we kissed. I was on cloud 9. Even as I woke up, I was elated.

There has been only one other dream in my life that I can remember this vividly. It was in the 7th grade. It was about her too.

Today I visited her where she works. Beautiful as ever. I still wonder to myself how she can stay single looking the way she does. But it doesn't matter to me.

Because today, I have decided that at any cost, I will pursue her. I'm going to ask her out for dinner. I'm going to... do something for Christ's sakes.

Because I know all about her past relationships. She's talked to me about her problems and I always think to myself, "I can treat her right. Nobody loves her as much as I do."

And I do. I've never been able to say it, but at the bottom of my heart, it is what I feel.

I love you, Jasmine Gutierrez.

 

And that is the sweetest thing I've ever heard

 

i agree.

 

MX, that's pretty deep dude. You go get her man.

 

Life is simply good. I love my friends, I love them so much.
They're insane, sexy, fun, nice and they're outcasts, so the sleepover this weekend will fucking ROCK.
And, me and him talked a lot today in French class, which was great. Then he took me by shock when he waved at me (with his healthy hand) on my way home. Made my day. Yeah, I know I'm pathetic.
And Fanie keeps hugging me all the time. I'm not complaining, I LOVE it.

I feel happy. I always have a smile on my face when I walk home.

So I'll just end here before I continue making this immeasurably pointless post even more pointless.

 

BLAAAAAAAAAAAARG​

so fucking disoriented​

 

[not directed at anyone here]

You're a bunch of stupid bitches. You think you're so cool, with your shirts down to show your breasts, and your pants so low your tacky-looking thongs show, and your i'm-so-cool clothes, and you're better-than-thou attitudes, and your stupid minds. You're idiots. You seem to be capable of thinking for yourselves, so why are you like this? Why would you, you stupid cow, decide to ignore me because I did not do something I never promised to do anyway? And then your sheep decided to ignore me, as well. I left your group in World Culture, I left your group in Russian Language, and I'd sure as hell jump to leave your group in history, because I know you'll try to pass off my work as yours. What the fuck? Do your own fucking work. Don't ask me to come to school earlier so that you'd be able to copy all my homework down. And when I came to school just before the bell that marks the beginning of the first lesson, and sat down with who I fucking wanted to, and not you? Fucking pwned, bitch. I'm so tired of your two-faced-ness. I've tried to be neutral, but you keep pulling me in. I don't ike your intolerance, either. You kiss eachother on the lips as a hi, and you laugh and wrinkle your noses at bis and homosexuals? Hypocrites. My dirty bisexual germs and I laugh in your slutty faces.

 

Mali, people like that really suck, we've got a ton of those kind of girls in the earlier grades at my school... they're just stupid and just try to ignore them. I know it may be hard but it's the best thing to do because if you confront them they're too stupid to even understand what you mean.

Ignore them and hang out with the people you want to hang out with.

 

wow Mali. just let them go, you are so way above them sweetheart.

 

Currently I've been thinking a lot about death and quite honestly I'm scared as shit. I don't know why, I've thought about death before and its never scared me. Now it really really really really does.

 

Well, my life as I know it is over.

I moved out of my parents' house to live in Eau Claire, to go to school, and to transfer to a new store for my job. Unfortunately, something got mixed up and I no longer have a job, and nobody seems to want to hire a college kid for anything. So I'm paying rent (fortunately tuition is paid), and losing money quickly. I don't know many people in this town, and one of the few that I do (my boyfriend)...well, I'm just waiting for him to dump me now.

I'm a broke fucking loser.

 

I'll be your friend, if that's any consolation ahaha.

Don't worry, dude, I'm 16 and in college. I'm TOTALLY fucking broke, especially since no one hires 16 year olds apparently ;;

I feel your pain chica <3

 

Agreed.