Got Something You Want To Let Out?

. Stupid compulsive flirts and their just friends bullshit.
Fuck this, fuck this, fuck this, fuck this.




Please excuse the language.

 

Eghr!! I cannot stand him anymore.. Alex...

I hate when this happens.. So, I have known this guy, Alex, for almost two years, he was one of my best friends, we were like borther and sister, and now since I moved to another city, he doens't talk to me anymore.. I call him and he doesn't pick up the freking phone.. or answer my e-mails.., or anyhting
Seriously, why does people have to change like that??
I still consider him as one of my best frineds because I cannot forget 2 year of friendship and specially ours.. but this is ridiculous!!, it's not like I'm going to chase him and asking him "What that heck is wrong?, do you hate me or something?".. I'm just not, because I already tried and he doesn't even listen to me!
I'm freaking done with him right now, it upsets me so bad, and it hurts me too to watch how my "friends" pass by and don't really care about anything but themselves..

 

So, my friends and I are around one of the few shopping plazas here getting something to eat, and we go to Rite Aid to get some candy, right? One guy and I want to get some Diet Coke and Mentos and make a rocket, but we're short on cash and can't get any extra stuff. So, I consider just taking the Mentos, and I stick them in my pocket, but then I decide against it and throw them back. So, the other guys go and pay, and I wait off to the side. When we leave, this lady comes out of nowhere and stops one of my friends and asks him to see a receipt, which he doesn't have because he fucking stole a spray candy that was cost a fucking dollar. My friends and I wait around outside, and every so often an employee comes outside on a break and tells us something about it. This girl told us that since he was underaged, they were just going to call the cops to take records, and then have his parents get him.

So, to make a long story short, my friend's in deep shit.

We were actually kinda disappointed because we didn't get to see the cops take him away.

 

i have so much pain within me.....i feel like inflicting pain on myself....yet i noe that it wont get me no where....i want to cut myself to see if it works....but i noe it wont...

 

Just grow the fuck up.

 

I think there may be a teensy weensy possibility that he may like me back. Wow. That totally gives me a warm and fuzzy feeling that will last until Monday.

 

Maybe he meant it..
But, I'm afraid it could be real, there's so much to live and he knows it.
But the fact saying "I love you" is not a sentence..
It's more than that.. There are feelings behind those words, and they don't stay echoing in your ear all day long, because you'll know when he meant it.

So this is just another example on how reality wakes you up and nothing more. There's nothing more to say in here but to shut and stay listening and watching from other people's mistakes and prevent them. Don't fall into the hole now. Don't do it.

It's a mistake and he knows it, because when I asked him back if he meant it, he just stayed quiet and thought about it for one last time. And then after five cold minutes, he said yes.. He was already in the hole and had to say yes because he didn't know how to get those words back and how to turn back time. I saw it in his eyes, that weird look when he's confused and now I'm just another doll, just there, waiting for him, but no for long..

I'm done and everything is over now. No more pain or drama.
No more nothing, no more everything.
What I thought, it would be a heaven now becomes hell because he got me into the hole too and now there are no words or any feeling left.
Just a past, with bad memories and nothing more.

 

Well i just broke up with the one girl who i thought was my soulmate, my heart aches so much it actually hurts me inside, i just....i guess i just never thought it would end...ever...and now i'm left standing there..heartbroken.

 

Aw...
It hurts... I know the feeling...

 

My grandad is seriously ill and in hospital and there are numerous other things I'm beating myself up over. For fuck's sake.

 

s to everyone.

 

I didn't get a class with the girl that i wanted to, crap!

i swear in all my classes there isn't 1 good looking girl this is gonna be a long semester. *sighs*

 

Sometimes I just need to keep my mouth shut...

 

sometimes that's not a bad thing cause you get more work done and are focused more, but yeah not getting the class with the girl you like sucks, i know the feeling..for 2 years lol.

 

oh..

I just broke up with my boyfriend..
after 4 long months...

....................

 

what happened?

 

he moved to up North USA...
and apparently things were not going to work out as a long relationship..
so that was it...

It sucks... 'cuz there wasn't anyhting wrong with us at all..
just moving... how stupid..

 

Ah that sucks. I know the feeling, being far away from each other.

 

yeah... I'm really sad..
I cried the whole day actually..
but now I'm ok, I guess.
He's leaving tomorrow and wants me to go with him to the airport but I'm sure I can't handle that.. it's too hard..



Edit: thanks for the hugs! made me feel better