For my Mermaid.

Discussion in 'Your Projects' started by Arhaz, Oct 6, 2005.

  1. #1
    Arhaz

    Arhaz ...waiting. LPA Super Member

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    For my Mermaid.


    I’m stuck away in a lonely drought,
    I’m staring at the emptiness, something I never brought,
    I wonder if a star would come and kiss me willingly,
    Or take away the nothing that I’ve got.
    I sat there alone,
    As the whimsical moon rays upon me shone,
    And reminded me of the hopeful times,
    But now I’m bare, withered, torn.
    Everything at peace,
    When beneath the waters, some lives shall cease,
    Of imaginary mermaids and drowning fireflies,
    Happiness, to exist, pleads.
    Touch me again,
    Don’t leave me alone, to drive me insane,
    I hear you, but like others, see you not,
    Come alive and relieve my pain.


    it desperately needs your comments... ^_^
     
  2. #2
    Linja

    Linja Good. Be magnanimous. Über Member

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    It has a ... mystical, mythical vibe. Nice work.
     
  3. #3
    Arhaz

    Arhaz ...waiting. LPA Super Member

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    thanks girl.. ^_^
     
  4. #4
    heshboy

    heshboy Well-Known Member

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    You know you have done better, but nice none the less. Great Job.
     
  5. #5
    GrafiTTied

    GrafiTTied Well-Known Member

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    hmmm i dont really know what to say,
    im just looking at it blank, maybe its my mood.............................
    i'll read it again later and tell you, its not bad or anything,
    i just cant think of any constuctive suggestions right now

    sry
     
  6. #6
    Arhaz

    Arhaz ...waiting. LPA Super Member

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    thanks for the comments... ;)
     
  7. #7
    Messy Marj

    Messy Marj LPA Addicted VIP LPA Addicted VIP

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    It's short, sweet and sad. Just what I like. Well done Arhaz.. ^_^
     
  8. #8
    Arhaz

    Arhaz ...waiting. LPA Super Member

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    thankie ^_^
     

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