Urban Vampire.

Discussion in 'Your Projects' started by Arhaz, Sep 25, 2005.

  1. #1
    Arhaz

    Arhaz ...waiting. LPA Super Member

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    Urban Vampire.


    And far away from the wilderness, I still feel the savage love,
    In the city now, searching for my identity, as the crowd gives a casual shrug,
    Is it true that everyone has seemed to forgotten all that I gave to them?
    Is it so easy to cast away all of your fears even when…

    I come out from the shadows, grabbing you by your hand,
    You don’t seem to mind, though your soul screams out to a holy land,
    In a dark alley, far away from the people who would care,
    I tear your skin, and have my share and drench myself in your blood from within.

    A merciless red flows amongst the air in a misty form, haunting,
    It reminds all of human kind, mocks them, everyone’s now counting,
    How many years has it been since this young lost soul was exiled?
    Where have you been hiding from me all this while?

    I come out from the shadows, grabbing you by your hand,
    You don’t seem to mind, though your soul screams out to a holy land,
    In a dark alley, far away from the people who would care,
    I tear your skin, and have my share and drench myself in your blood from within.

    The gleaming lights now narrow down to frightening blur,
    All the victims of mine true love gasp helplessly as I kiss her,
    And I’m enriched once more with the sweetness of human blood,
    While I rejuvenate in my veins, a beautiful angel falls into the mud.

    I come out from the shadows, grabbing you by your hand,
    You don’t seem to mind, though your soul screams out to a holy land,
    In a dark alley, far away from the people who would care,
    I tear your skin, and have my share and drench myself in your blood from within.

    I’m sorry that you have to pay for this; it’s you I’ll miss,
    I’ve never felt such a want to live, such awesome bliss,
    Forgive me for my lover’s pride shall take no more forms or lies,
    But hidden behind the street lights, you’ll know I’m there when you hear her cry.




    i'm sooooo blocked.... :(
     
  2. #2
    Linja

    Linja Good. Be magnanimous. Über Member

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    I love the topic. It's not your best, but it's still pretty cool.
     
  3. #3
    D_A_V_I_D

    D_A_V_I_D Pure Pwnage

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    I think someone has writers block :mellow: .

    It's not terrible, just not as good as you can be. It diesn't flow the greatest in some parts. The concept is ok but i know you can do better.

    Just keep trying, i know you'll do better soon. :hugz:
     
  4. #4
    Arhaz

    Arhaz ...waiting. LPA Super Member

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    *runs*

    j/k....
    hehe

    thanks guys...it's like i have these awesome concepts in mind, but i just fail to put them down...i need help :(
     
  5. #5
    lp_sk8ergurl

    lp_sk8ergurl Well-Known Member

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    It's ok.
     
  6. #6
    Arhaz

    Arhaz ...waiting. LPA Super Member

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    "ok" is good enough when i have a writer's block. thanks ^_^
     
  7. #7
    Ether

    Ether Well-Known Member

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    I know this is probably going to sound silly but when I had writers block I just wrote down random words non stop for like and hour....and I mean non stop! DO NOT REMOVE YOUR PEN FROM THE PAPER! Well....it helped me, just a suggestion anyway ^_^
     
  8. #8
    sickcycle

    sickcycle Well-Known Member

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    I don't know how much of a help I can be for writers block since I have the weirdest way of coming up with subjects for poems; like for example, the poem "What the Willow Sees" came from a Keebler cracker I was eating, on one side it said something like, "The Elves in the old Willow" and I thought that sounded cool, and I love how sad a willow tree looks, so I sat down and put sad and willow together and bam, a story/poem, from a cracker.

    If I have no ideas though, I read titles of old poetry from Edgar A Poe, Alfred Lord Tennyson and so on. Just the titles though, usually a word here, and a word there stick out and then give me something to go on, I hate reading the poem though when in that state, because you tend to plagiarize.

    Or I write down some like root words, like main words, death, pain, hate, revenge, scheme and so on. From there I think of all the synonyms I can and develop a cool sounding title, and then from there make a story out of the title. Well I have rambled on for some time, so I hope it helped, writers block sucks, but your poem doesn’t, I like the subject to it, but it lacks punch I guess.
     

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