Hi, I know what I'm writing down is not a story, but I felt like I had to let it off my chest, in fact it is a story, a short one, since it's mine. Ok, so here's the thing I'm in a depressive state since last october and even though I take light meds for it (not prozac, something lighter), I still don't feel good. I pretend at work that everything's alright, trying to get them off my back and convince myself in the process that everything is not as dramatic in my life as I think it is. But everytime I think that it's ok, that I should try and be less depressed, something really bad happens to me, and not just one thing but a lot of things at the same time. It's like Meteora went out, so I bought and the same day, I bought tickets for me and my sisters to go and see them live in Paris, France in June. So I started to feel a little better, I told myself that I had to. And then, as usual there's something terrible happening to me. People try and tell me to look over it, that it'll pass, to be cool about things that happen to me, but I can't. How can you be optimistic when you suddenly learn that you're rapidly losing your sight (and there's nothing you can do about it, not even eye surgery...) that your worst nightmare is taking over your life. I have no friends, no life whatsoever, no one is willingly speaking to me at work, I have to go to them and act like a geek around a popular kid at school, I'm ugly and now I learn that soon I'll go blind. Plus, I have a lot of heath problems, like I'm too fat... Can you see yourself walking more than a mile in my shoes? Where can people see the optimistic side in this? I'm in a living hell right now and most people would have gotten into drugs or kill themselves over what I'm living but I'm not, I keep trying to get better, but unfortunately I can't. My life is already pointless but now with my sight issue, that's like the final straw. I don't even see the point anymore. I'm hopeless and so lonely. Well, I'm sorry I bored you with my story I just needed to let it all out. Well, there's a lot of things that I'm depressed about that I won't write about here. Trust me you don't want me too. Here's an untitled piece of bad and crappy writing: (all mine of course cause it sucks!) I lie awake in my bed, late at night And as I watch the moon in the sky with a sigh I let go of a cry I cry Cry for the life I've never had Cry for the one I'll never have All I got left is crying I'm tired of this never ending misery I live in What's with all this misery anyway? Do I have to bear all of it on my own? Can anybody join? Or is it a private club? Cause I'm so tired of this feeling Why can't I have some joy? I want to go away.... ===The End =====
Wow, I must really have depressed everybody cause no one answered my thread ! I'm sorry if I did and I assure you that if you contact me by AIM I won't depress you, ok?!
wow. i'm really sorry. I feel exactly like you, depressed and angry at myself about having no friends at all. And that untitled piece you wrote is awesome. I wish you the best of luck. And let me tell you that if you do go blind you're not dead, it's only one sense. So just try to leave your life as good as you can. ...