Pride, Beauty, Love and Revenge

Discussion in 'Your Projects' started by Arhaz, Jun 6, 2005.

  1. #1
    Arhaz

    Arhaz ...waiting. LPA Super Member

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    i need your comments on this one too, please! ^_^





    Pride, Beauty, Love and Revenge.


    Is the ocean wild enough to humble my pride?
    I’m worthy of enjoying my every careful stride.
    But things seem so far at hand from me
    It’s only because I’m paying for my penalty.
    Not a crime, an accidental disaster,
    I sacrificed my every moment for her.
    I was made of things that held me high,
    And yet I couldn’t stand her cry.
    I loved her complete, loved her true,
    I tried my hand at things I’d never do.
    Came love, and it pushed me far enough,
    I’d give her compassion, and she was my dove.
    I’d pet her beauty and pamper her senses,
    I’d fight with forts and leap over fences.
    I give her my mind, body and time,
    There you go, that was my crime.
    And she left me barren for another lad,
    Said that she was something I’d dream I’d had.
    But yet my pride plays these stakes,
    I’ll get her back, give all it takes.
    Not to love her once again, never again,
    I’ll show her deserving murderous pain.
     
  2. #2
    Muri

    Muri It never ends.

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    WOoooooooah. I love your latest work. Really! This is great! Keep it going! :D
     
  3. #3
    D_A_V_I_D

    D_A_V_I_D Pure Pwnage

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    A-M-A-Z-I-N-G (w00t)

    As always your work is totally amazing. It is just excelent. I love reading everyones poems and seeing the different styles. It is weird to see the way people naturally write poetry.

    I would have to say my favourite part would be this:
    It is too great to decide on one part. Another masterpiece to add to the collection of your brilliant works. Great stuff.
     
  4. #4
    fallenangel

    fallenangel Well-Known Member

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    damm, david you got there first! thats my thoughts exactly!

    my god your writing has came on in leaps and bounds and it is fantastic! keep it up ( although you probably will anyway!)

    *waits for more*
     
  5. #5
    Glue

    Glue Well-Known Member

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    wow...nice work... :D
     
  6. #6
    lp_sk8ergurl

    lp_sk8ergurl Well-Known Member

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    You got the talent.
     
  7. #7
    Arhaz

    Arhaz ...waiting. LPA Super Member

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    thanks so much guys! you are great!
    i'll be writing more soon!


    thanks sooooo much!!! ^_^
     
  8. #8
    Messy Marj

    Messy Marj LPA Addicted VIP LPA Addicted VIP

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    w00t. I so love this style. This is my favorite till now. ^_^
     
  9. #9
    Arhaz

    Arhaz ...waiting. LPA Super Member

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    thanks marj! ^_^
     

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