The Results

Ok here is something new

I havn't had much time to write and i havn't had much time to refine this one but i'm afraid i won't get time for a while. i wrote this for someone and you can guess why.

I’ve let my dark feelings,
Take over me, control me
They don’t let me see
Blind me to what is good
Only let me feel the pain,
Make me want to run away

To escape the pain,
To escape this world,
Where all I feel is pain,
To just run away,
To just be free,
To not hurt any more

Then I see, that I can escape,
And be free of all this pain
A knife to my wrist
And one quick swipe
And I just sit there
In a daze

To escape the pain,
To escape this world,
Where all I feel is pain,
To just run away,
To just be free,
To not hurt any more.

I feel myself lift up
And leave all the pain behind
How great it is to be free
To fly like an angel
No pressure, no guilt
I’m at peace

To escape the pain,
To escape this world,
Where all I feel is pain,
To just run away,
To just be free,
To not hurt any more.

As I fly up,
To a place I have longed for,
I watch all those,
That I have left behind
Watch there pain as the see the corps,
Watch them dial 911

To escape the pain,
To escape this world,
Where all I feel is pain,
To just run away,
To just be free,
To not hurt any more.

As I watch on,
And look down at those
I once loved,
Watch the tears run down their cheeks
Look at the pain I have caused,
Thinking I know how they feel

To escape the pain,
To escape this world,
Where all I feel is pain,
To just run away,
To just be free,
To not hurt any more.

I watch as they burry my corpse,
So many people around,
Not just my family, but people from school,
People I thought wouldn’t even care,
So many people that loved,
So many people that I have caused pain.

To escape the pain,
To escape this world,
Where all I feel is pain,
To just run away,
To just be free,
To not hurt any more.

Now that I look back,
I wonder if I should have done it
When so many people really loved me,
When so many people could have helped me.
But it is human nature,
To not realise what is there ‘till it’s gone

To escape the pain,
To escape this world,
Where all I feel is pain,
To just run away,
To just be free,
To not hurt any more.

But the discission is made,
There’s no turning back,
Did I make the right choice?
I shall never know,
So I float up to heaven
If there is one.

 

wow...this was really heartfelt! i think this one actually stands good the way it is.

idea for a title could be 'escape'. just a thought.

but this is really good, every emotional. it's probably a good poem to read if you are actually thinking of suicide cause it shows both sides of the story, the pain felt and the doubt if it was the right choice.

great work.

 

Wow you posted it on here too? Well like I said earlier, it means a lot, David.

 

Thanks.
I'm glad you saw it the way i wanted it to be seen.
I didn't want a judgemental poem. I wanted something reflective that showed both sides. And that the decision is final no matter how u feel in the end.

Escape is ok. i was looking for something that describes the poem a bit more like "A Premature Ending" what do u think of that.

 

It sounds good.

 

Thanks

 

yeah, i think that is better but i still don't think it totally decribes the poem fully. can't think of anything else though. sorry

 

Man, you are just awesome. You know? I've noticed something curious: The fact that you talk about death as something so beautiful that you make me want to experience it everytime my eyes feel the words seducing the thoughts behind them. You really are capable of convince people and make them considere a different point of view.
wicked!!!! I really liked this one. Keep going!!!

 

yeah i completely agree with sparkling,this is an awesome piece of work,very thoughtful,keep it up.