So, I wrote the intro/outro bit a while ago and lost it, only to find it a few days ago. I thought it was alright so that was step one done... The rest of the song just kind of fitted together. Originally the chorus was gonna be a verse, and the intro the chorus but I thought the verse part was really good so I used that instead. One part of the song I like is the first part of the first verse (the part used as the bridge aswell). Though I'm not sure why... Enjoy! "Assumptions" When will the pain scams stop the feelings, Of total devastation, no way to find a meaning? Times like these I just wanna go back to the way, The way it was, back in those peaceful days... I know it'll never happen, 'Cause you think you're always right, You usually are, But you shouldn't just assume. And this is breaking me down, 'Cause today you told me, To ask someone else, I'm just waiting for the news. You think I'm time consuming, Time you could be using, Getting over me, And who the hell was he? Does he treat you like I did? 'Cause I really don't think so, It must be denial, But I don't want you. And this is bringing me down, But I don't want back in, I never needed you, You just naturally assumed. You think I'm time consuming, Time you could be using, Getting over me, And who the hell was he? You think I'm time consuming, Time you could be using, Getting over me, And who the hell was that guy? I know it'll never happen, 'Cause you think you're always right, You usually are, But you shouldn't just assume. When will the pain scams stop the feelings, Of total devastation, no way to find a meaning? Times like these I just wanna go back to the way, The way it was, back in those peaceful days...
this is pretty good. i would say that you change the last line of the first stanza to "peaceful days" instead of "peace days," and if it goes with the beat/syllable pattern now, then change something else. real cool song though.
I see what you're saying. I wrote that first part as an anti-war song so it was 'peace days' meaning the days of peace, but yeah, you're right. Thanks alot Any more comments?