Jokes

Discussion in 'Random Chat' started by Burningsoul, Dec 2, 2004.

  1. #41
    Razan

    Razan SUGAAAR!

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    the joke is

    Why did the chicken cross the road?




    blabla, i dont know the answer [/b][/quote]
    Oh!

    Now I get it the chicken was crossing the road and the dad's dick got stuck to it!

    I know I'm not supposed to laugh because I'm twelve but :lol:
     
  2. #42
    Razan

    Razan SUGAAAR!

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    the joke is

    Why did the chicken cross the road?




    blabla, i dont know the answer [/b][/quote]
    Oh!

    Now I get it the chicken was crossing the road and the dad's dick got stuck to it!

    I know I'm not supposed to laugh because I'm twelve but screw that.
    LOL :lol:
     
  3. #43
    rgb_xero

    rgb_xero Banned

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    okay there is these two muffins in an oven right?
    the first muffin says ''OMG WE'RE IN AN OVEN''
    then the second one says ''HOLY CRAP A TALKING MUFFIN''
    _________________________________________________________


    ha ha ha i love that one!


    :rob: :rob: ::ashley:: :rob: :rob:
     
  4. #44
    Burningsoul

    Burningsoul Well-Known Member

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    very good :lol:
    What do you call a blind deer
    No eye deer :lol:
    What do you call a blind deer with no legs
    Still no eye deer :lol:
     
  5. #45
    Adam

    Adam !!!! LPA Super Member

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    There were three friends trapped on a desert island; a blonde, a brunette and a redhead, they were without food, water or anyway back off the island. But they came across a magic lamp and a genie and he said "I shall give you three wishes, but since there's three of you I'll give you one each."

    So the brunette had the first wish and said "I want to be off this island and at home with my family."
    Then the red head had her wish and wished for the same as the brunette.
    Then the blonde looked around for awhile and the genie then asked her for her wish, she then answered "Were are my friends... I want my friends to come back."

    Then the brunette and redhead reappeared on the desert island.
     
  6. #46
    Jennster

    Jennster "That's hot."

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    :lol: HAHAHAHA!
     
  7. #47
    Kate

    Kate beat me senseless LPA Super Member

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    Two penguins were sitting in a bathtub. One turns to the other and asks, "Hey, could you pass the soap?" The other looks offended and says, "No! What do you think I am, a typewriter?"

    and

    What's the difference between orange?

    Peanut butter, because motorcycles don't have doors.
     
  8. #48
    Leslie

    Leslie huh? LPA Super Member

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    HAHAHA, I love these kinds of jokes! :lol:


    Q: How many pancakes does it take to get to the moon?

    A: None, silly. Bicycles don't have windows!
     
  9. #49
    Vampire

    Vampire Banned

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    So a guy walks into a bar...ouch!
     
  10. #50
    Rather Red

    Rather Red Well-Known Member

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    Me: What kind of charity have you given lately, you selfish fuck?

    Christopher: Well, I bought the U2 CD!

    so that was lame.
     
  11. #51
    Holiday

    Holiday Married and on a life-long adventure! LPA Super VIP

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    HAHAHA, I love these kinds of jokes! :lol:


    Q: How many pancakes does it take to get to the moon?

    A: None, silly. Bicycles don't have windows! [/b][/quote]
    lol i had no idea.....it took me a while to get that i wasnt supposed to get it. :lol:
     
  12. #52
    Mechanical Christ

    Mechanical Christ Ein heißer Schrei LPA Super Member

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    LOL. :lol:
     
  13. #53
    Will

    Will LPA Addicted VIP LPA Addicted VIP

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    How many emo kids does it take to screw in a light bulb?

    None, because they're all just sitting in the dark, crying about it.

    :chemist:
     
  14. #54
    Razan

    Razan SUGAAAR!

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    :lol: LMFAO So whiny and lazy!
     
  15. #55
    Will

    Will LPA Addicted VIP LPA Addicted VIP

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    Q: Assume that you're traveling 95 MPH in a red Corvette on the highway. How fast can you shingle a dog house with pancakes?

    A: I don't know. Ice cream doesn't have any bones.
     
  16. #56
    Messy Marj

    Messy Marj LPA Addicted VIP LPA Addicted VIP

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    Roses are red
    Violets are blue
    I'm schizophrenic
    And so am I


    Will could have wrote this :lol:
     
  17. #57
    Kate

    Kate beat me senseless LPA Super Member

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    Disclaimer: Some of these jokes may be unsuitable for overly religious folk, but know this--none of these are meant seriously.


    How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb?

    Three. One to hold the bulb, one to shake the ladder, and one to sue for faulty product.


    How many frat boys does it take to change a light bulb?

    Twenty. One to hold the bulb, and nineteen others to drink until the room spins.


    How many sorority girls does it take to change a light bulb?

    Two. One to hold the diet soda, and one to whine for Daddy.


    How many Mormons does it take to change a light bulb?

    Four. One man to actually do it, and three wives to tell him how.


    How many Southern Baptists does it take to change a light bulb?

    At least fifteen. One to actually change the light bulb, one committee to oversee the changing of the light bulb, one committee to select an appropriate light bulb to replace, and one committee to approve the changing of the light bulb.


    How many Lutherans does it take to change a light bulb?

    None. Lutherans don't like change.


    How many trumpets does it take to change a light bulb?

    Five. One to do it, and four others to brag about how much better they could have done it.


    How many trombones does it take to change a light bulb?

    Just one, but he'll do it too loudly.


    How many flutes does it take to change a light bulb?

    One. She holds it up and the world revolves around her.


    And my personal favorite band joke--

    How do you get two piccolos to play in tune?

    Shoot one.
     
  18. #58
    Messy Marj

    Messy Marj LPA Addicted VIP LPA Addicted VIP

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    Those are reallyyy lame hehe

    What do Alexander the Great and Kermit the Frog have in common?
    Their middle name.

    Which Search Engine does Arnold Schwarzenegger use?
    Alta Vista baby.

    What happened when Batman and Robin got run over by a steam roller?
    They became Flatman and Ribbon!
     
  19. #59
    Burningsoul

    Burningsoul Well-Known Member

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    what 2 say 2 that :lol: kiddin
    What do ya call a man wearin a blue hat?
    A man wearin a blue hat, what else
     
  20. #60
    Unforgiver

    Unforgiver jogo bonito.

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    LOLLMFAOROTFLOL&MFAO, that was a good one, i have one that is similar to it, it goes like

    there were three men walking in the beach, and one finds a magic lamp and a genie comes out of it and says "I shall give one wish to each of you", and the first guy says "i want to be blonde and a good surfer", so he got his wish, the second one said "i wanna be blonder than him and be a better surfer", so the third one then laughing his head off says "i want them to have their hair black again and make them be the worst surfers again, hahaha".
     

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