Discipline

Discussion in 'Serious Chat' started by Trish, May 8, 2004.

  1. #41
    Leones

    Leones Super Member LPA Super Member

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    I think spanking and slapping your childeren can be good, but not always. When a child has got to an age of responsebility the parents physical punishment has to stop. And parents have to know clearly why they punish their child, because if they hit for no good reason the child doesn't learn anything of it and will become afraid or disrespectfull against it's parents.
    I don't respect my father because he doesn't have controll over himself. It's a circle we are trapt in. If he thinks that I say a disrespectfull thing to him or my mother (he doesn't hear that well, so he understands it wrong sometimes) or if I ignore him, he doesn't know what to do and builds up a lot of energy that wants to get out. (my father has a burn-out so he's very tense) Sometimes he knows how to controll it but other times he's like he wants to kill someone, mostly me. One time I was really afraid of him because he wanted to damage me seriously bad, he screamed and punched me. But my mum came in and calmed him down. Everytime such a thing happens I have less respect for him, I can do two things, just talk or ignore him.
    Now it's getting some better because my parents see that I need a life of my own. But I can't wait to leave this house and move to an other place. I won't miss them.
     
  2. #42
    Anya

    Anya Lost LPA Super VIP

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    I don't think so. If my mother ever hit me I would be extremely angry. You don't SLAP a child simply just because he or she needed a lift to go somewhere. I mean, sometimes that child can't seem to help it. I mean.. I can relate to it.

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    Example 1:

    Teenagers, such as ourselves, sometimes aren't at the eligable age to get a job at their moment in life. They can't seem to buy anything at their leisure and it puts a firm hold on them making them feel in a way 'trapped' because they can't go on and live and buy things on their own like a normal adult could. Teens around this age tend to want to feel a little more mature and more on their own. I know I do. So they tend to want to be treated like one and sometimes even considered one. It's a normal phase we all go through in which point in time we'll realize being older and being an actual adult isn't all it's really cracked up to be. But in the childs mind they still want that freedom, that feel and sense of maturity. So asking your parents for money once in a while isn't a bad thing, all they need to do is once in a while understand. They were kids once, right? Instead of slapping them because they were supposedly 'nagging you' just form an agreement. In turn of lending them money, when they get back, let them work around the house to pay of their debt. I don't see any harm in that, it teaches them a valuble lesson and in turn gives them a great sense of maturity knowing that they did somthing that made them feel more up-to-level with people older than them for once.

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    And as for driving your kid somewhere and giving them a lift, it shouldn't go as far as slapping them for nagging you either!

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    Example 2:

    I'm 14 and i'm not exactly permitted to drive yet, right? Well I have a social life to ya know. Parents, sometimes, have to go out of their way to let their children have a social life of their own. It's apart of growing up and getting along with other people. Sometimes, my parents won't even take me. To tell you the truth, my Dad is extremley lazy. He's never taken me to a friends house ever before in his life. He did maybe once or twice but then he stopped because he decided he wanted to stay home and sleep or watch TV instead. My Dad's a ####### couch potato he doesn't even have his own job. I don't see why he can't get up off his lazy ass for once and drive me somewhere but for some reason, my complaining, and opinion on why he should take him never matters to him. He always says "if you want to go over there her mother has to pick you up and take you home" being as rude as he can to her mother. It's really not fair, he only cares about himself and nothing but himself and that bothers me and because of that I barely even have a social life. For other teenagers, I know it must not be fair for them either. It's completley normal to want to go hang out with a group of friends and parents should understand that completley. It's important for us to grasp that opportunity and have fun while we can because when were older, responsibility will take over and we will have to work more than having fun and going out to play.

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    So that's my opinion, if you need to say anything otherwise then say it.
     
  3. #43
    Michele890

    Michele890 Well-Known Member

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    Um.. I definatly disagree with it. My mom is a total push over and probably spanked me once my whole life. Although, most people don't agreee with that. I mean..... If my mom had hit me, I would only resent her and that would definatly ruin our relashonship. I think smacking is for parents who don't know how to control their kid so they hit them so they'll be scared. You shouldn't hit a ######## kid anyway. The only way I would have learned from that is "Oh no if I do this mommy will hate me and smack me". But my sister my brother & I know right from wrong. I babysat for kids who get spanked, and all the little boy does is smack because they think it's punishment And they think it's acceptable.
     
  4. #44
    Anya

    Anya Lost LPA Super VIP

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    Aaron does that? Sorry, just asking 'cause he's the only boy I know of that you babysit.. hey, call me i'm bored lol. :p
     
  5. #45
    Michele890

    Michele890 Well-Known Member

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    Aaron does that? Sorry, just asking 'cause he's the only boy I know of that you babysit.. hey, call me i'm bored lol. :p [/b][/quote]
    Yes....
     
  6. #46
    TheSunIsShining

    TheSunIsShining Well-Known Member

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    i disagree, my parents used to hit me until i went up to them one day and asked them if it was illegal.


    im still scared of my dad =(
     
  7. #47
    Jila

    Jila Super Member LPA Super Member

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    yeah, i agree with anya on the whole age thing. its like kids dont really have much rights and its not fair that parent should be able to hit their kids who are like 10 times smaller than them when they do something wrong. and i mean its not "acceptable" for kids to hit their parents even if they do something really stupid. like if you come home drunk and your parents hit you and you say you deserved it, but then you cant do the same thing to them if they come home drunk and smash things. its just not right.
     
  8. #48
    Kæton

    Kæton is Keaton LPA Über VIP

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    Being a son who was brought up on physical discipline, I can say that I don't love the physical discipline. It's never taught me anything but to dislike it and cower in fear when my parents raise their hands.

    In my entire life, I was always a quiet kid (still am), but since my parents descend from actual Asian cultures, physical discipline is supposed to make your children stronger. Everytime I annoyed my parents, they'd hit me, but that never got me any stronger, it made me more scared of my parents, and this is a reason I barely stick up for myself... As a young child, I was led to assume anything I say that offends others or anything would get me severely hurt and I never wanted to experience that again.

    Maybe once or twice in my life I deserved to be hit for beind such an a-hole, but I don't agree on a consistancy to hit your child for being a child. Children grow with time like everything else living, and I personally wish I wasn't one of those who suffered physical discipline because now I really believe it is part of the reason I never speak up or defend myself. However, being of Asian descent, I believe that they've only done it with the best interests, and I will love my parents until the end of time, even with my disagreements and everything, you can't change who your bloods are.

    There are different cases of to why children are hit as a disciplinary action, but even though I disagree with my parents for the way I was brought up to fear out-spoken-ness, but we're all human, so even though I cannot forget, I can forgive.

    However, I think my situation is different. I think in Asian families, your parents are supposed to put an amount of "fear" into their children, thusly giving the expected amount of respect for them, but I don't really know for sure.

    Excuse me if I went off a bit :lol:.
     
  9. #49
    freaklikemeh

    freaklikemeh Active Member

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    some children arent disiplined enough..
     
  10. #50
    Michele890

    Michele890 Well-Known Member

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    haha ! way to stop em!
     
  11. #51
    TheSunIsShining

    TheSunIsShining Well-Known Member

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    i was only 10 though...


    keaton...all i can say is im exactly like you, but i hate my parents for what they did
     
  12. #52
    ass_kicker

    ass_kicker Banned

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    i dont think a way to rise a child is by hitting them. thats just BULS*IT. my dad beats me up. im sorry, but its screwed to think it has a positive effect on me or whatever. i nearly hate him now.
     
  13. #53
    ella1432

    ella1432 Well-Known Member

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    I think it's wrong to hit your kids. It's just a lazy way to discipline them, and research shows that parents that were hit as kids still have respect for their parents and hit their own kids, believing it to be correct.
     
  14. #54
    ass_kicker

    ass_kicker Banned

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    yeah i know my grandpa used to beat my dad up. he's an alcoholic. my grandpa i mean.
    i have a very alcoholic family. i just realised. :eek: :mellow:
     
  15. #55
    tkd_rap

    tkd_rap Banned

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    yeah i know my grandpa used to beat my dad up. he's an alcoholic. my grandpa i mean.
    i have a very alcoholic family. i just realised. :eek: :mellow: [/b][/quote]
    sorry, i just found the fact the that a guy named "Ass kicker" is posting is the disiplen topic, lol
     
  16. #56
    ass_kicker

    ass_kicker Banned

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    sorry, i just found the fact the that a guy named "Ass kicker" is posting is the disiplen topic, lol [/b][/quote]
    :lol: hahah sorreys if my name offends some people... besides, im not a guy :p hello. my name is katie. *shakes hands*
     
  17. #57
    Leones

    Leones Super Member LPA Super Member

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    :lol: hahah sorreys if my name offends some people... besides, im not a guy :p hello. my name is katie. *shakes hands* [/b][/quote]
    yeah my grandpa kicked ass too


    :lol: :eek:
     
  18. #58
    ass_kicker

    ass_kicker Banned

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    yeah my grandpa kicked ass too


    :lol: :eek: [/b][/quote]
    hahah our grandpas are agressive pirates :lol:
     
  19. #59
    Leones

    Leones Super Member LPA Super Member

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    hahah our grandpas are agressive pirates :lol: [/b][/quote]
    was actually



    :lol:
     
  20. #60
    LPpride006

    LPpride006 Well-Known Member

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    i dont think its right to hit your kids just to discipline them, because it only makes it worse. my dad thinks its okay to just beat me up whenever he wants to because thats the way he was brought up . i hate him for the fact that he hits me anytime he wants while i cant do anything about it and now im just plain afraid of him so much that i cant do anything about it
     

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