Forever Lasting Scars

Not too sure if it's good or not. I like it I guess.. tell me what you think! I tried hard. I think the flow needs work though.

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Scars last forever,
but nothing compares,
to the pain that marked it's territory,
and rightfully put them there,
like ancient writings plastered on me for eternity,
eating away at my sanity,
mumbling incoherent profanity,

but deep inside I know what lies true,
it wasn't me it was you,

building walls of fire,
to protect me from saddness,
not only that,
but happiness,
as intoxicated as I seem to be,
it's actually me,
beating on my insides,
the gray skies,
still,
the scars remain lifeless,
as the emptiness fullfills.

 

That was pretty good, Anya. Nice job

 

Thanks Fi, anymore comments?

 

Very good, Anya! I really like it a lot.

 

Thanks Andrea!

 

good.

 

I like it. Again, very real & honest. What I mean by that is I really pay attention, and think about what I think it means, and I like it, I can relate

 

Thankyou Chele, I think your the only one here who understands it the most. Since your the only one who really knows me.. lol. Thanks, love ya!

 

yo i think that it is very good
[eating away at my sanity,
mumbling incoherent profanity]
(my fav bit)
but i think that you should make the name shorter like incoherent (scars if you like) profanity

 

I think i'll stick with the name I have for now, but thanks for the suggestion.

 

I think i'll stick with the name I have for now, but thanks for the suggestion. [/b][/quote]
Hmm..I like the name, and the poem.


But I love the poem. Great job, Anya!

 

Thanks!