i haven't written any lyrics in a long time so these might suck Never be the same again I feel so empty Like there’s nothing left inside of me You are going away Leaving me all alone All alone in my own dark and empty world I know I’ve never really opened up for anyone Not even for you But it was enough for me you was there for me Even though I have other friends No one is ever going to replace you You mean the world to me And I know we’ll meet again And that this is not the end But I also know that things will never be the same again I don’t know if I can never trust another person Like I trust you We are completely different but still completely the same I’m going to miss you and I hope that you feel the same But I know, things will never be the same again this one doesn't have a name yet I want to wake up from this Endless nightmare Thought hurting myself will Help me come back into reality Thought of seeing/feeling my Own blood bleeding out of me make All the pain go away Thought that the physical pain Will make all the pain inside Go away and at least Leave me feel numb I thought I had the courage I guess I was wrong I don’t want to feel this pain inside of me anymore I don’t want to hear the voices inside my head I just want to be normal Or at least not feel anything I guess that’s too much to ask and that Leaves me out of options. I take a long deep breath and Then lift the small pipe right next to My head and I pull the trigger And finally I feel the pain leave my body All the voices are gone and I finally Feel whole and peaceful Always so quiet Always so quiet and Always so nice When we talk you just nod and whisper Like the world would end if you’d said something wrong You’ve never opened up to me, you always kept your distance from everyone On the outside you seem cold and absent But I know who you really are I know you are kind and understanding but still you Keep your distance Never letting anyone know your true feelings, Know the real you I hope that someday you would Open up to someone even if it isn't me Cuz I know that if you don’t you end up Hurting yourself End up hurting me And I don’t ever want that to happen to you because I love you and the last one... Why? I don’t know why I’m Feeling these things I shouldn’t Why am I so angry, so confused? Why can’t I just be happy? I’ve always been surrounded by people Yet I’ve always felt so alone No one to talk to No one to share my feelings to I can only blame myself For locking everything deep Inside Never letting anything out Never trusted anyone with anything Why? Why can’t I share anything? Why can’t I just spit everything out? Every word, every thought Why does it have to be so hard? Why can’t I trust people? Why do I jump at every touch? I want to be touched, Want to be held and hugged But every time someone touches me I just jump and back away okay... tell me what you think
Never me the same again First, this line amkes no sense "But it was enough for me you was there for me "Maybe change it to "But it was enough that you were there for me." In general, it seemed a bit casual. Not really very poem- or lyric-like. Not horrible, just a bit cliche so it didn't stand out. this one doesn't have a name yet "Own blood bleeding out of me make" Should be makes. Also, you seem to make new lines wherever you feel like it. Don't break fluid sentences in half. Also, you seem to kind of write run-on sentences. Maybe you should try to write short pieces of prose. Short stories or just paragraphs. It might suit your style more. "Leave me feel numb" Should be feeling. Always so quiet "Like the world would end if you’d said something wrong" "you'd" should be you. "Cuz I know that if you don’t you end up" I wouldn't use "Cuz" in a poem. It seems to casual. Also, your first poem you said you wouldn't open up, here you say others should. A bit hypocritical. Why? It stills doesn't really feel like a poem (or especially a lyric) but it is my favourite one of the bunch. Overall Overall, it seemed was to casual, like you were just talking. To me they didn't feel like poems. They all had a nice emotional message, but seemed to be lacking in anything to distinguish them for the sea of similar poems in existance. A bit too cliche, sorry. I'm not trying to offend you, just pointing soemthings out. I really think you would be better suited to things like prose though.