Got Something You Want To Let Out Part 2

Sarah, Remember, Least you HAVE a job.

It is called WORK for a reason.

 

I have been so fucking depressed lately that it's starting to impede my ability to even function. I'm 21 years old, I should be full of energy, and yet it takes a ton of effort on my part just to get out of bed anymore.

 

At least it gives me something to do in my day and get paid for it.

I feel so bad for going out with another guy now that I know I'm not really keen on and I see us ending pretty soon. I don't want to lead him down the wrong path but I have known him for a few months I'll give him that. He's also my friend's ex I found out today. I originally didn't want to get into another relationship because of the shit that Shannon would deal out at me and the man in my life. But I don't know what to think nowadays, I'm confused and hormonal.

It can't hurt to try out another guy could it if he's willing to take the added responsibility of me and my child unborn right??

 

^ Before you're goin to decide just think about the pros and the cons. It's your choice. =)

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Life is always fair

 

*hugs*

 

I didn't think it was possible to fall in love from that clinging 5% attached to memories to 200% when everything is working great. It's overwhelming.. I missed her more than I even understood.. I just need to cool myself down, I'm getting caught up with the good I feel like it should be a consistent flow, Well that's how you fall the hardest. You want more more more until you fuck something up by being an overbearing asshole.
We had a great 3 days in a row, now I need to realize, Yeah, I won't see her for a while, probably until School starts on Tuesday or Wednesday even.

But I don't understand this.. We had a great day today, nothing was wrong at all. Yet I get home and feel like, Just because it wasn't EXTRAORDINARY, It was a letdown and i'm all down about it. I don't think that was related to her at all, I just was looking forward to this party all week and the PA kept cutting the vocal mics in and out and my friends band kinda..sucked, haha.

Other than that it was a great night, I hate how the outcome of those things are making me feel bad all around, I just need some sleep or something..

 

I know he's going to demand a DNA test when I tell him about me and another guy.

I've got nothing to hide because 100% I know he's the father but it angers me that he has to go to that extent that he doesn't trust me.

I know he is going to give me a hard tme.

I know he is going to give him a hard time.

 

Oh hey thanks mom for making me feel so low as a person. You keep denying it but you're so full of shit that you don't realize what you are doing to me. Thanks for embarrassing me in public to the point where I actually had to apologize to people on your behalf. To think you could sink no lower. I love you to death but that love is turning to hate. I don't want to hate you but you leave me no choice sometimes. As soon as I get a job, save up money yet again and get myself situated, I'm leaving this house. Then you'll realize how good you had it when I was living with you and how much you screwed it all up.

 

:/

 

I think you meant not having a job...but yeah.

 

Crap. I'm attached to him.

 

Shitty days






...Are shitty!

 

Depression is like my classmate. These past few weeks, I've been dealing with it. Problems are always there. I guess all peope experience it. Life is always like this. Thank God, there are review classes( makes me busy), sketching, books, and music. These simple things keep me alive.

 

I was cheated on multiple times. Fuck you, you lying piece of shit, waste of oxygen, fucking whore.

 

Don't worry, love. She'll get what she deserves soon, but don't waste your time talking trash about her or whatever because she isn't worth it and you are so much better than that <3

I miss you!

 

Thanks guys.

 

Sorry to hear that Daniel, that's fucked.


I really wish people could tell me things without the influence of alcohol in them. I'm fucking fed up of that shit...got something to say? Fucking say it. Don't get pissed and then start going off on one.