Got Something You Want To Let Out Part 2

Ah I love her.

Thats all.

 

Haha it's not that,



anyways we've admitted that we like eachother, but we won't be a couple.

 

I LOVE HER! I MISS HER. CAN'T WAIT UNTIL SHE GETS HOME FROM DRIVER'S ED.

 

I'm tired...but I can't sleep...I'm plagued by depression...I had a guest today...I can't get this smell out of my nose...she had this wierd scent...it's driving me insane...fucking disgusting (to me anyway)...eventhough it doesn't stink or anything. I find myself...ugly right now. I want to be stronger...smarter...taller...it's just too much pressure...to confused to put this all together in some order...I just know that this is what bothers me...at the moment...more is sure to come...





EDIT:
I've thought about death a lot lately...I don't WANT to die...but...

I guess I wouldn't mind...as long as it isn't me putting my life to an end...

 

Let's see. Today it didn't go as bad as I supposed it would go. But it was interesting. I was excited, anxious and yet, kinda scared. But it worked out just perfect.

I guess, the thing that I most liked was the way that he challenges me. He's open minded just like Socrates, which is kinda cool because he'll answer with a question. I'm impressed by the whole thing went down so good to be my 1st day... I actually can't wait to go tomorrow and so for the rest of the week.
I've worked with him before because I used to suffer from insomnia, but this time it's different and so his methods. I really underestimated him.
Idk, I'm actually happy I'm doing this in some part... and yes, it's got me all excited to know that everything is going to get better, including myself =D.
*Sigh*

Anyways, just felt like letting my thoughts outta of my chest. =)

 

oh god...

 

I did that once. I've been regretting it for the last year.
Not that I wanna confuse you or anything, just be careful you won't regret missing your chance...



On a brighter note, my CT scan came back today.
With something on it.
Theres something abnormal on my brain... my fucking brain!
If this is whats causing my migraines I'll be glad, 'cos I'll finally know.
But it might be serious...

I've never said this before in my life.
But I'm scared....

 

I feel that it's a good decision for now .



Sweetheart I hope it's nothing serious.

 

So long as you're comfortable with it, good for you

Yea, it probably isn't, but this not knowing thing... driving me nuts.

 

I don't wanna leave her. I know it's only been a couple days, but I'm like growing attached to her. It sucks that I have to leave after hours of pure snuggling and kissing, I hate the drive home. Oh well...

 

I blew it, didn't I.

 

Aww...I know exactly what you mean. It breaks your heart a little everytime you're parting ways again. Just think about the next time you're gonna see her again. Because you will, right?

 

Fuck.
Went to the doctor today. If it's what he thinks it is, I'm fucked.
Can't remember the word for it, but one of the arteries in my brain is screwed, and could explode and kill me basically.
Either that, or I have to have brain surgery. Dangerous, brain surgery.
Apparently I'm the youngest person they've ever seen with this problem.
God...

And that's not whats even causing my migraines.
Fuck.

 

Damn.

I really wish you all the best and don't give up hope.

 

Thanks babe

 

If you ever wanna talk about it, you know where the PM button is okay?

 

Thanks, you're a legend.

 

Holy shit!...I really wish you the best of luck...I'll keep my fingers crossed for you.

 

Thanks mate.
Odd as it may seem, it makes a difference that even you guys who I've never even met actually care.