Dependency On Drugs

Those close to me (and there's very, very few anymore on LPA) know that a year ago (around Christmas 2006) I had a substance abuse problem with cocaine. Around that time, I had my first real job at a grocery store called Kroger. I was making decent money, and I didn't have anything to pay except gas. So except for $40 a week in gas, I generally had around $100 to blow on what I wanted. Rewind to the Summer of '06 and you'll find where my problem began. I was already tore up off 7 somas (muscle relaxers) and a 6 pack of beer. I went into the night having a small idea as to what was going to be happening. They came back with an eight-ball of cocaine (roughly 3 to 4 grams). With it being my first time, and already fucked up out of my mind on pills and alcohol, they only allowed me to do a couple of lines. From then on, I was hooked. Well, somewhat.

I got the job at Kroger around Thanksgiving. By the time December was rolling around, the white lady came back into my life. I was working with a childhood friend turned huge acidhead. He had the connections. I had the money. It was a recipe for destruction. And destruction did happen. Within 2 weeks, I had blown around $150 on cocaine. I was eventually fired from Kroger after Christmas, and my money and connection to the drug were lost.

Within those 2 weeks, I had developed a huge dependency to coke. I remember being at our family Christmas get together at my grandparents, and sneaking out to my car to get a couple of lines in. I lost the love of my life because she couldn't handle my "coke rage". She moved to Mississippi a few months ago. I haven't talked to her or heard from her since.

I still have a problem. Like anyone with a problem like this, there's always the chance of relapse. I'll admit, I've relapsed a couple of times recently. I'm nowhere near where I used to be, but lately... I have no one to talk about this problem with. I think a thread like this on LPA (my 2nd family) could do wonders for me, and for other users on this board (because I know there's some).

Look, bottom line... this thread is to discuss YOUR problems with drugs (legalization, drug problems, etc.) or if anyone in your family or your friends use to the point of self-destruction. This is your venting place. Consider this a more serious and drug related "Do You Have Something To Let Out?" thread.

P.S. - Marijuana, Mushrooms and LSD has no place in this thread. This is for serious, hardline drugs such as crystal meth, cocaine, heroin, escstacy, speed, etc. But, if you feel marijuana, shrooms and acid are "bad drugs", and would like to contest what I said, what better a place to do it in then a drug thread, right?

 

My bro's life is a bit fucked up right now because of drugs and alcohol. He's addicted to both - if he's not drinking he's doing drugs and vice versa. He's experimented with various drugs and is a speed addict at the moment. He's also addicted to Marijuana.

It's a shame because I hardly see him anymore these days and when I do he's either high or drunk or both.

 

Well.. Marijuana's not an addicting drug actually.

I've never really done any drugs, besides weed a couple of times. I don't really go out of my way to do it though, because drugs really aren't all that important to me. So that's pretty much proof right there that weed isn't really addicting, otherwise I would be doing it non stop by now. As Casey said, it's really not a hard drug. I have a friend of mine that used to do Cocaine, but she no longer does it. My friend Emi did once or twice, but somehow she really doesn't crave it at all. She just does weed now. But yeah, no real experiences for me, and probably never will be lol.

 

Growing up, my best friend was a drug dealer. He started off selling weed but later continued on to Ecstacy and Cocaine. Being around him almost every day, I was ALWAYS surrounded by drugs. I remember I smoked my first blunt at the age of 16. I always thought that weed was going to be the only drug that I have do but sadly, I was wrong.

Enter college. I'm 18 with a fake ID. I start getting into clubs and bars and start expierimenting with Ecstacy. Slowly and slowly, I start to pop more pills the more and more I party. It got to a point where I honestly thought my heart was going to rip out of my chest. My best friend still deals drugs today, but now the only drug I'll do is weed...and I don't even consider that a drug.

When my sister was killed by her ex-boyfriend when I was 15, I turned to alcohol for my problems. Cliche I know, but it was my way of trying to deal with her death. It got to a point were I was drunk almost everyday. I would come home and not even know who my own brother was. It got so bad that I was starting to ruin my relasonships with my friends. No one wanted to be around me because I was drunk everyday. I'll still have a drink here and there, but I know my limits now. I started smoking cigarettes so I wouldn't have to drink when I go out.

I know there are more people out there with problems like Casey had but don't feel sorry for me. I have no one to blame but myself.

 

escstacy. I love it. I was using it pretty bad for a few months last year but I slowly stopped because I met my current boyfriend and he helped turn my life around before it went to a huge addiction. I had a crappy job, which I went to drunk or high almost every day. But yeah, with his help I stopped. I just took it once, with the intention of it only been a 1 off thing, but I just kept taking it.

I still crave it every day. I want it so bad and its harder now because my best friend is getting into it. I would love to get into it again but lucky I've got my boyfriend.

Yeah, my story isn't that bad, I just though I'd share anyways. I'm really sorry to hear about that Casey and Paul.

 

I live in a town that's know as the Drug Town here in Serbia so I have a lot of friends that used to have problems with drugs or are having them now. That's the worst things that could happen to a man. I even know some of the biggest dealers in town. I remember at one occasion, when I guy who went to my school overdosed and died the guy who was his dealer just said mehh one customer less, I'll make up for it. I couldn't fucking believe. And also, one of my best friends is working in an anti-drug unit for the police. So yeah, I'm kinda surrounded by drugs.

But I.. I never tried any drugs. Hell, I never even smoked a cigarette. I see how fucked up people around me are and I just don't wan't to end up like them. So yeah, I do not know exactly how hard it must be for you with drug abuse problems but I wish you all good luck with dealing with it cause from my experience it only leads to the certain death and nothing more.

 

Try telling that to my bro and all his friends.

 

sorry to put that out of context... but what??? that sounds horrible (besides everything else in this thread of course). don't know why, but this just touched me somehow...


and weed IS addictive. my best friend started smoking weed when i we were 16 and he always claimed that he could stop smoking if he wants to (same old story). two months ago, after a year of no contact to him, we met and he confessed that he did harder drugs and totally came off track with his life... well, he then admitted that he WAS addicted to weed aswell. he told me a story of when he told his mother that he could immediately stop smoking weed and was assured by that, but he couldn't stop.
it does not have such a high addictive-level like, for example, heroin of course. but like so many other things, you get used to it and that CAN be a serious problem.
i know that im judging by experience from my personal environment rather than from myself (i'm strict against smoking), but still...

 

well i know alcohol isnt really a drug and all but still i got addicted to it when i was 14, i know its kind of ridiculous..but yeah, when my girlfriend and life-long friend died, i was pretty devastated and yeah and at that time i was quite close to my cousin and he said that alcohol would ease my pain. i know he meant well but after my first few bottles i got hooked on it, my cousin would get me them bottles because he meant well he didnt mean for me to get hooked on it but i did, i ended up screwing up my work and also got kicked off the local footie team because i would either turn up for training pissed drunk or not at all, eventually the alcohol caught up with my fitness until i started to struggle even when i was running 800m and well now i am sort of better off now that my cousin has been trying to correct me and still do a few beers here and there but no more hard liqour im too afraid of fucking up my body again and now im still only 17...recently i tuned up my intake again after my new girlfriend left me, i know its really immature, but i really hated what was going on in my life because my relationships just took two hardknocks in less then two years and i wasnt really up to getting knocked down again. Now my cousin is weening me off alcohol and helping me keep cover for my mishaps and what not when i'm drunk...but i guess im pretty lucky compared to what the rest of you guys have went through

 

I have done cocaine and ecstacy, but only socially (eg a party, or going to a gig or something) but i guess im pretty level headed to know when enough is enough, and ive never had the craving, just gives an extra kick to your evening

 

This happened a couple years ago, but my sister, Maria, was dating this guy named Jake. I didn't like him, my brother didn't like him, nor did my parents like him. She secretly dated him behind our backs and one day my aunt drove by our house and saw his car in my driveway. She told my dad and my dad got really pissed. For some reason, Maria kept defending him and saying he is a good guy so she moved out because she wanted to be with him. She ended up moving in with him at his apartment in Downtown Chicago. They dated for a couple of months, and my sister caught him cheating. They got into a huge fight and I my sister attacked him with a broom after he hit her. One thing led to other, and he ended up stabbing her.

The bastard is now in jail for second degree murder.

 

He would've gotten life if it was premeditated, but it wasen't. He got 14 years.

I swear to god if I ever see him when he gets out I will fucking kill him myself. You can bet my life on that too.

 

I'm with you, I've never been drunk or taken any drugs. I mean, I've had a few drinks, but like just a few hard lemonades or a white russian here and there. But I just don't want to lose any opportunities in my life because I'm caught up in an addiction.

 

I've never done drugs and I'm not planning on doing them either.

I'm really against drugs because they destroy your body and your mind, seen it happen with a couple of good friends of mine. Even though they just did Weed, a lot of them flunked that year of high school while it was a really easy year. I'm 100% sure they would've passed if they didn't do Weed during the lunchbreak.

@Arlene&Derek: Never been drunk either, I completely agree.

I hate losing control over my body and that's probably the main reason why I wouldn't even experimentate with drugs.

Also a lot of people I look up to musically got fucked up on hard drugs and died because of that addiction. I just don't understand how people can do drugs after seeing that happen.

About weed not being addictive, the drug it self might not be addictive but the mixture with tabacco is. Those friends I talked about got hooked on regular sigarettes after smoking a lot of weed. I don't know if that's always the case, though.

Paul, I'm so sorry to hear about your sister, I can't believe stuff like that would actually happen to someone I know (even though, it's just on the LPA). He most definitely should've gotten life in prison.

 

As you all know, I drink frequently but I never let this get in the way of work or anything.

I've tried a few drugs as well. Weed mainly but I've done 'shrooms, one speed and ecstacy a few times as well. I don't think I'll do ecstacy or speed again 'cause it didn't really do much for me. Shrooms were funny as and I've given up Weed (I'll be honest, I was never fond of the taste you get when you smoke it ).

I almost got jailed for dealing at one point as well. I was pretty much thrown up to hang by a few people I knew as they all claimed that I'd given them the weed which we'd been caught smoking. The fuckers. Thankfully my mate stuck up for me and in the end charges couldn't be made because the only evidence was some video footage which could have shown us smoking a cigarette.


Anyway, I prefer alcohol to drugs for two reasons. The first is that I feel I've got more control when drinking and secondly that I know I'm not gonna get locked up for drinking booze.

 

Man.. I'm really sorry to hear what happened to your sister.
I don't mean to sound preachy or something, especially that I have no clue about how you feel, but he's already done you enormous harm, don't let the fucking bastard ruin your life completely by killing him.

 

I get drunk about every weekend and I've smoked weed, but that's it. I'd love to take some of the harder drugs, but I'm so affraid to get addicted. I wouldn't want it to control my life. It's bad enough that alcohol's taken over my weekends. Also, I've heard and also believe, to quit one addiction, you have to start another. So basically, stop speed, start weed, stop alcohol, start heroin...that's basically how one of my closest friends got away from cocaine and speed. I mean, he's not nessecarily better off, smoking weed and drinking vodka 24/7...but hey. It works for him.

EDIT:

LSD isn't one of the harder drugs?...all I know about it is that most people get on horrortrips when they take it. Stupid question: What seperates the harder drugs like speed or heroin from drugs like LSD or weed?...how are they harder?

 

LSD and weed aren't really deadly. On the other hand... coke and heroin are extremely damaging to your health. Every time you do them could be your last. It's like playing russian-roulette with your body. Weed can be damaging to your lungs if you smoke it for a LONG period of time. Even then, though, it
doesn't even equal a fraction of the damage tobacco will do to you. LSD is
just a hallucinogen that doesn't have many addictive properties. Unless your
some crazy fuck like Timothy Leary.