Got Something You Want To Let Out?

I just think something you have to think about not wanting to live anymore is how final it is. You're never going to be able to go back and see what could have happened. I mean, eventually you'll be out of the hold of your shit parents and whatnot, but if you give up early you won't be able to experience everything that comes when you're away from the shit beginning. Things do get brighter, you just have to hold on for a while. I'm doing it, and you can too.

If there's people that are hurting you you just need to get away from those people. Life is the most precious thing, and you need to hold onto it, because you have to realize that you're never going to experience it again. And I'm sure right now you're at one of those stages where you think it's definitely not worth experiencing, but I guarantee in the future you'll be very happy that you waited.

 

Casey, trust me that's not the way. I used to be suicidal too, and trust me there's nothing pretty in looking at your bloody veins and saying "Ohh...I'm going to die". I know there's no way I can pursuade you to drop it, but lovers arn't everything in life. And you're having a bad time because you make yourself have a bad time. Instead of looking at the problem in front of you and smiling at it, you're bowing straight down to it with suicidal attempts. And your life is valuable, weather you believe it or not, it is. If you believe your life is terrible, your day is terrible, etc., you'll make it terrible. If you simply glance at the problems and smirk, saying "Ahh, whatever, THAT'S not going to ruin me, is it? I'm stronger than this!", then that'll already help you out a great deal.

 

And I think Derek nailed it when he said no person is worth giving your life away to, unless you're married.

And you're very young still, too. Since I'm the same age as you I know the girls and people around and they're all people that can't really be trusted, because they're so unsure about everything it seems. Plus all of the adults are thinking you're a dumbass teenager who, if you're not showing yourself off academically and everything, probably don't think you amount to much. You just have to get that philosophy on life where you realize that it's about you and not anyone else, and what you need to do is thrive to make yourself satisfied with life.

 

Casey, I'm probably the last person in the entire world you want advice from but just read what I've gotta say.

I dunno whether it was love or not but I had a girl who I would have practicly died for. We were a team. We'd been through so much. Hell this time 2 years ago I was next to her in a fucking hospital when she had Pneumonia and yet in June she flew to Canada to live there and I havn't seen or spoken to her since. That fucked me up for a while but I got over it and you will too. Another fact is that I've never even met my father. There have been times in my life when I think he should have been there but he wasn't. It's screwed up but I just take it and move on. Trust me man I know it's easier said than done but you need to hang in there. After all you'll never know that things will get better unless you actualy live to see it.

 

Wow. Interesting V-Day. 'twas a day of mixed emotions.

I started out with my new "Free Hugs" campaign, which actually went very well. It was all just an idea I got after watching the video on YouTube. Anyway, I ran into a friend of mine (Who happens to be one of the best friends of the girl I've been eyeing for nearly two years), and she said, "Hey, why don't you go hug Karli?" (Karli is that girl's name) Right when I heard that, I froze up. How the fuck did she know about that? I asked, and it turned out that a friend I thought I could trust told her for whatever reason. So, I am genuinely furious with her. I can only imagine what could happen now that Karli probably knows, because I think I love her, and I'm not sure of what I can handle.

As if that wasn't enough, my other friend, who happens to be my ex, was moping around all day because her boyfriend of three and a half weeks broke up with her. So, I gave her a hug, like any other good friend would do, and all of the sudden, she blurts out, "I still love you, you know..." So, I'm struck with a mind-numbingly awkward moment, and I need to explain that I can never feel like that about her again. It's not fair. I was having a great day, and she just had to go and make me feel like shit for moving on. I spent a while just convincing myself that it's her problem.


Finally, my mom made me go to the doctor to have some marks on my head checked out, and apparantly, they're potentially dangerous. I'm supposed to have a biopsy some time later. This is making me worry beyond measure.

So, there's my day. Hopefully another day of Free Hugs can help me feel better.

 

Matt, my Ex (Sarah) told me that she misses me more then her current boyfriend at the time, who she glorified the extream on how wonderful he was. She admitted that he was sooo similar to me, and all. Just over all, she wishes so and so didnt happen, didnt break up with me, and wishes she was back with me

Now its been almost a year since our break-up and Damn, i wish i didnt move on.
Just a tip now- just keep in touch and let it go on y'know? let her come back to you? lol

 

So I just got done looking through old comments on myspace. And I did it to start clearing out ones that profile's were deleted. And well...Bad idea.

It just brought me down, because I kept reading the comments from my friend Brittany. God, I miss her. A lot of the comments did put a smile on my face though. But it just hurts knowing she's gone. And visiting her grave was hard to. On the front of her stone is a beautiful picture of her. And then on the back there was a picture she drew for me when I was feeling depressed, and unloved. And so she drew me a picture of her surrounded in little hearts and it said, "I LOVE YOU."

And I still wait for the phone call she promised me. She said to me, "I'll call you when I get home. I promise, Big Bro. I love you so much." I just hate that even though I know she's never going to call, I still wait everynight for that call to tell me she's home.

R.I.P. Brittany. I love and miss you sis.

 

i feel so alone is not even funny.

 

You're not the only one

 

it's an awful feeling, i need a gf.

 

Trust me J., when you are in a relationship you don't want to be in one, and when you are not in one you want to be in it. Atleast it was kind of my situation.



Today, when I came back from school, I cried and cried.

 

Yeah, Mali's possibly gone and ruined it.

Super mega hugs to absolutely everyone

 

Tight, tight hugs to Aisha and Malilove.

 

i hate my sister, she's a bitch.

i wish i could have the guts to kill myself, but too bad i don't.

 

Thanks all .


LJohnny- You sound just like my ex here. What's your reason?

 

People are fucked up nowadays, people who were my friend are now like enemies, everytime a new person turns their back on me, plus i feel alone and i think i will never find a good girl to be with, i'm tired of my sister thinking she's the greatest, my family sucks so many people and almost all of them are useless.

Plus recently i'm missing my dad a lot (he died 12 years ago) and i keep thinking how unfair is the world. Seriously my mom is what is keeping me alive, she's been through so much (i hate pretending everyday like everything's fine) i don't want her to be sad by my depression and stuff.

I'm asking things like "why is the world so screw up?" i thought the world was suppose to be better but sadly it keeps getting worse by the day.