self mutilation

[rosanna]

anyone?


i want to see what people think before i say anything, i don't want people to think i'm crazier than i am.

[Ronin]

personally, i dont think its an answer. I never saw it as help to me, but others feel it is a way to free themselves, so I dont care about it really. course, i would try to stop them from doing it, but i cant control them entirely.

[Canadian Joe]

Pointless with a capital P. I really don't see the point in it...you realize you fucked up, so you fuck yourself up some more. Why not just beat the shit out of a pillow or something (which is what I do ;) )

[rosanna]

someone once said that physical pain is easier to deal with than emotional. people can see it. there is a purpose to fixing it. it's obvious. people can see you're in pain.

then there is the whole release thing you get, with the adrenaline rush...very exciting, but it would be better to find another way to get that same rush.

[.Amanda.]

people can see you're in pain.

then there is the whole release thing you get, with the adrenaline rush...very exciting, but it would be better to find another way to get that same rush.

Those are the two dumbest statements I've ever heard about self-mutilation...ever.

If you believe that, then it sounds to me like all you want is attention.

Stop... give the people with REAL problems a chance to get noticed.

[Canadian Joe]

Those are the two dumbest statements I've ever heard about self-mutilation...ever.

If you believe that, then it sounds to me like all you want is attention.

Stop... give the people with REAL problems a chance to get noticed.

THANK you.

[rosanna]

hey i don't do it but i have a friend that did once upon a time and that is what he told me. you don't have to bite my head off.

[Canadian Joe]

hey i don't do it but i have a friend that did once upon a time and that is what he told me. you don't have to bite my head off.

We're not biting your head off...just trying to state an opinion.

[.Amanda.]

We're not biting your head off...just trying to state an opinion.

Yeah, that's what you wanted, isn't it?

[rosanna]

yeah about it not about me i don't do it. that is why i didn't say anything in the first place and wanted to see what people thought first.

[Intergalactic Christ]

Well, I also like the adrenaline rush. And I am no attention whore. I honestly find it makes me feel a whole lot better. I've gone from grieving to bouncing around the room, in the space of half an hour or so. And I've also used it as a cry for help before, but only with the 1 person. So I'm with Rosanna here.

Saying that, I would probably never encourage other people to do it. Not because it's stupid, but I hate it when other people get upset.

I don't know, I can't see another way of dealing with losing a sibling, nothing's going to bring him/her back. I also have big trouble with crying and talking about my feelings. I try, but it usually ends up as meaningless babble!

[rosanna]

like i said, i don't do it. i have, though, last time was because i was suicidal and it was to hurt someone else. i guess it was more of a suicide attempt, which proves my point of why i hate usig razorblades to do it, cuz im still here.:ermm:

my friend, though, his arm is cut to pieces and he is really good at hiding it. only a few people know.

[Aaron]

Self mutilation isn't just cutting yourself. It ranges all over, such as: picking scars, plucking eyelashed, chewing on your nails. People do these things because they're just a habit, not because they're in pain or they want to hurt themselves. I myself bite my nails as do many other people. We aren't exactly looking for attention or to hurt ourselves, we just do it because it's a habit.

Whether you guys and gals see it that way is your opinion. But this is how I look at self-mutilation.

[rosanna]

well said.

[Debus]

Most pointless waste of time ever. I'm not gonna say people who self harm are stupid...'cause that would just be harsh but seriously, anyone who self harms in any way needs to seriously think about their life. It doesn't make things any better. When things do get better they will have a constant reminder of those hard times which just isn't nice

[Joe]

Cutting yourself is entirely different from biting your nails, it's a whole different level of self mutilation. Biting your nails isn't dangerous, they can be barely categorized as the same thing. Anyway. I think cutting yourself is nothing but a cry for help. I've read & heard the reasons people do it and I think there are just better ways to solve your problems. I've said it before & I'll say it again; Stick metal in your CD player, not in your arm.

Now, people who cut themselves for attention really need to grow up and find a better way to get sympathy. If you want attention that badly put a blade to your neck instead and do us all a favor.

[rosanna]

yeah well people don't do it for attention all the time, my friend from like 1st grade told me she was doing it and i had no idea. no one did.

[.Amanda.]

Here are my views on the topic at hand in a nutshell:

If you cut yourself, you've obviously got problems to one degree or another. If you FLAUNT the fact that you cut yourself just so that people will notice you, you're a sick freak and you really need padded walls and a nice new white jacket. Grow a brain and get a personality, you'll get more attention that way than you ever will by carving shit into your skin.

Now, here is my view on the subject at hand in only one word:


POINTLESS.
Seriously, it does nothing except leave you with permanent reminders of your own self-pity.

P.S. This is the last post I'll make in the topic. My work is done here.

[Anthony]

shadow not only covered her opinion, but mine as well - though mine consists of far more laughing
its like the whole 'straight edge' thing in a way. if you want to 'go clean' then that's fine but is there such a need to make such a big scene? i find it a tad moronic
but yes, shadow got it bang on

[Tom]

:lol::lol::lol: I think the whole thing is just stupid and pointless, and you just look like a freak i don't even see why people think like that, it's just attention seeking, what amanda said; Pointless.

[Intergalactic Christ]

Sadly, it isn't pointless: it helps. At least that's what I find anyway -shrug-



If you FLAUNT the fact that you cut yourself just so that people will notice you, you're a sick freak and you really need padded walls and a nice new white jacket.


I don't know if you will read this, but anyway: can you explain what you're talking about here please? Some people genuinely do it as a cry for help.

[rosanna]

dude, you guys have to see something here. i am not talking about emo kids that sit there and go, ooh, look my parents hate me, i think im going to slash myself now. i mean real deal cutters, the ones that do it out of anguish and pain. those ones are the ones that dont say anything. i don't mean people carving hearts onto their arms. i mean people slicing up their arms in the dark, alone, sobbing, wishing they had the strength to go deeper. yeah, its a cry for help. they can't do it themselves. you people sit here and say well then go deeper, kill yourselves this time. that is not fair, and it is rude. everyone i know that ever cut themselves (at least on a daily basis) kept it a SECRET. my friend from first grade...the only reason she said anything at all to anyone is that she was there when i got drunk and tried to kill myself. she didn't want to be in that position herself, she wanted to get help before she got there. this problem is REAL. and if you loved someone and they had this problem, you would not be saying this.

i don't know what else to say, except that i think people should stop attacking everyone about them doing it. eventually it becomes an addiction, and you CAN'T stop. you would not be saying this to someone that became an alcoholic because their mother died or something and they drank to take away the pain until that was all they could do to function, so you shouldn't do it about this either.

[Anthony]

real deal cutters
thanks. i now have tea all over my keyboard


i mean people slicing up their arms in the dark, alone, sobbing, wishing they had the strength to go deeper
you make it sound so poetic and flowery, its quite sad

[Intergalactic Christ]

Trust me shep, slicing up your arms like that is NOT poetic and flowery. It's a shame, you can't say things like that anymore, the blind truth, without being accused of being "emo" or something.

[Anthony]

sorry dear, wasn't making a point i was just laughing at the fact it appeared she was condining the action because that's what its beginning to sound like

[rosanna]

no i am not condOning the action i am saying it is not fair to do what you guys are doing without knowing the reason behind why the people do it.

[Darcy]

It really depends on what you consider "self mutilation."

Having earrings could be considered self mutilation. Putting holes in your earlobes and then putting metal through them is pretty gross if you think about it. Same with any other piercings. Tattoos could be considered mutilation as well. If being stabbed by needles over and over again for hours isn't mutilation, I don't know what is.

In our culture, these things can be considered beautiful. I love tattoos and piercings, a lot of people do. In other places, having scars is looked at in the same way that we look at tattoos and piercings.

So my opinion of self mutilation is this: It all depends on your reasoning, and it shouldn't be done just to cause pain to yourself or to get attention.

[Aaron]

I was trying to imply that the title of the topic isn't exactly right. Should have been titled "Cutting" or "Attention Whores: The Cutters of Our Time".

[Intergalactic Christ]

What's with the last one? I really don't think all cutters are attention whores.

[rosanna]

this is a disease and i don't think that you people making fun of it is right. maybe you have never seen it i don't know but you need to stop being so derogatory.

[Aaron]

Seems to be a few who think they're in it for the attention, so I tried to please both.

I never said they were looking for attention. and i never said they weren't. Some do, some don't. I really don't care, hasn't affected me or my life.

[Mark]

this is a disease

Really? What's it's name?

[Joe]

this is a disease

Cutting is not a disease. People choose to cut themselves, people can't choose whether or not they have diabetes.

[Canadian Joe]

Cutting is not a disease. People choose to cut themselves, people can't choose whether or not they have diabetes.

Amen. Disease or not, it's voluntary. And if it's voluntary, I don't know if you can really classify it as a disease.

Excuse me while I chase my tail for a bit :lol:

[Michael]

I am an ex self harmer, I quit because I was hurting those around me. I dont know why i used to do it. It used to help me get rid of emotions and balance out what was wrong in my life. I guess it was my way of dealing with all the bad stuff which came my way.

Since i quit I have only done it every so often and not with anything sharp or dangerous. THe most i have done in the last few monthes is try to overdose and it took a lot to set me off like that.

If you try to quit you can do it. Just give it time. Took me eight monthes.

[Nikki]

Aaron: A little bit over the line, but a laugh nonetheless =P

It's a disease? Whoa that really is overkill. And like Shep, I'm laughing myself silly (though I probably feel a little more guilt then he did).

Anyway - people have all sorts of ways of dealing with problems, I suppose cutting is one of them, though yes I agree with the fact that it can just be attention whoring because seeing this sort of thing is so shocking to a person that they lavish more attention on the cutter, which makes them cut more etc etc.

So despite having a "leave them to it. It's not my problem" attitude, I do think that it's quite the wrong way of going about things.

And Rosanna: Yes it really does sound like you're trying to advertise self-harm. So maybe you should be quiet for a while or at least try to think before you type.

[Intergalactic Christ]

I know what Rosanna means by "disease". Sometimes you get so sucked into it that you really can't think of anything else to do to help yourself, other than cut.

[rosanna]

self-mutilation: the truth behind the shame

self-muti'lation n. mutilation of oneself, esp. as a symptom of mental disturbances E17
overview

Self-mutilation, or self-injury as I and many others prefer to call it, is the deliberate damaging of body tissue without conscious intent to commit suicide. Just like with eating disorders, self-injury is used as a coping mechanism in life. Whatever pain is inside of the person, whether it be from family problems, sexual or physical abuse, or emotional neglect, the feelings are unbearable and can only be released or "forgotten about" through the pain that comes from injuring one's self. The prevalence of self-injury is unknown because many cases go unseen and untreated, but it has been estimated that about 750 per 100,000 persons per year have problems with self-injury. (Rates of 34% and 40.5% have been reported for people diagnosed as having multiple personality disorder and bulimia.) Self-injury usually begins in late childhood and early adolescence, and although for some it becomes a chronic problem, most self-mutilators do not continue the behavior after 10-15 years. However, self-injury can be a chronic problem if the situation that triggers the victim to cut or hurt themselves continues to stay in their lives.


who.suffers.from.this

Common suffers of self-injury are abuse survivors, eating disorder sufferers, and a smaller group suffers from substance abuse and kleptomania. In the home of someone who hurts themselves often there is violence with an inhibition of verbal expression of anger, and/or a stormy parental relationship along with neglect or a lack of emotional warmth expressed by the parents. Sometimes there is the loss of a parent through death or divorce, or parental depression or alcoholism. Often the person who hurts themselves has rapid mood swings and suffers from some sort of depression, possibly even Bipolar Disorder. Perfectionistic tendencies and a dislike of the body/body shape are both characteristic of someone who is prone to self-injuring. When it appears that the family is in good shape but yet a child still self-injures, perfectionism and the feelings of low or non-existent self-worth are the next possible explanations as to what triggers it.


why.does.someone.do.this

It has been proposed that children who don't receive adequate protection and are abused, violated, or neglected, fail to learn how to protect themselves. They then re-enact their abuse and lack of protection through a variety of self-harming behaviors and this is how self-mutilation can begin. The person who self-injures experiences an inability to tolerate intense feelings and often has trouble expressing emotional needs or experiences, which is where the injury comes in to help "end" or lessen the stress. Injuring one's self can be looked at as a means of communicating anger and distress to other people when there are no other ways.

control.and.strength


For some, seeing the blood from cuts gives them an odd sense of well-being and strength - the same feelings that were stripped away from them at some point in their life. A self-injurer may injure themselves as a way of empowering themselves, as well. The person feels strong and in control by enduring the pain that they inflict on themselves.
punishment.and.protection On the flip side, a self-injurer may feel very unworthy and meek, and self-injury can be used as a means of punishment. This frequently is the motive with victims of eating disorders, as in both cases the feelings of unworthiness are there. Another theory is that the victim is constantly told that they are beautiful and that they will attract a lot of boys (girls if it is a male) and the person becomes afraid of being raped (possibly again) or victimized, so they create scars to hopefully scare away anyone who tries to come in contact with them.


Baby's got a problem
Tries so hard to hide
Got to keep it on the surface
because everything else is dead on the other side-NIN
why.it.doesn't.stop

Self-injury soon becomes an addiction and extremely hard to stop. Cutting, burning, or performing any other number of harming acts upon the body relieves, very quickly, unbearable pain and also releases the body's own narcotics called the endogenous opiates. Just like with someone binging but not purging, prolonging a self-injurer from hurting themselves can cause them to experience symptoms such as agitation, paranoia, and irritability. Because of this, it is too hard in the beginning for any self-injurer to stop, at least immediately.


receiving.treatment

As I mentioned up at the top, for most people the self-injuring behavior lasts about 10-15 years and then dies out, but this cannot be an excuse to not get help! Within those 10-15 years the emotions causing you or someone you know to injure themselves could get even more severe and frequent and lead to suicide attempts and cause other disorders, like an eating disorder, to get worse. You can also cause yourself more harm than intended from infection. Some people use rusty razor blades or dirty 'self-harm materials' to hurt themselves which carry tons and tons of germs that seep into the body. For someone with bulimia or anorexia this can easily cause their immune system to weaken even more and have the inability to fight off bacteria and viruses as fast as before the onset of their problem(s), leaving the victim to be open to the problem of getting sick and not recovering for practically months!

Just as with an eating disorder, the self-injurer should be treated ALONG WITH treatment for the eating disorder. There are self-help techniques and centers out there for sufferers of this demon, although it is always up to you to WANT to stop and to learn different ways of dealing with your emotions. You must find out, in treatment and on your own, why you hurt yourself and then what triggers you to hurt yourself. Stay away from the triggers as much as you can, and also be prepared to distance yourself with healthy activities when the temptation to harm comes. Realize that replacing pain with another form of pain is not recovery, nor does it help you! You will always have the same empty and alone feeling the more and more you do this, and you DESERVE to not have to put up with any more abuse.



source (http://www.healthyplace.com/Communities/Eating_Disorders/peacelovehope/mutilation.html)

so i guess that every self help thing out there is condoning this as well. because clearly, according to them, this is not their fault. they don't just turn people away and say "oh well it's your fault, fix it yourself, do us all a favor and kill yourself next time." do you know how worthless that makes someone feel? if someone you loved had this problem, you would not be acting so closeminded.

but then again i don't know anything about this right? i know more about this shit than anyone should know. i have been through it and instead of letting all of you sit here and berate me for what i'm saying, i am going to be proud that i have gotten through yet another self harming experience.

[.Amanda.]

but then again i don't know anything about this right? i know more about this shit than anyone should know. i have been through it and instead of letting all of you sit here and berate me for what i'm saying, i am going to be proud that i have gotten through yet another self harming experience.

Don't. You. DARE. Play. That. Card.

[Creep]

Well I've read all the posts in this thread and overall I must say that I agree with almost everything that Rosanna says. Not every person out there that resorts to physical self-harm does it for attention. I have a friend that really really didn't want to tell me about them doing it because they thought that I would think less of them because they did it. There are people out there that resort to it because it is easier to deal with than the emotional pain that they feel at the time. There are safer and more effective ways of dealing with emotional pain though.

[Canadian Joe]

Don't. You. DARE. Play. That. Card.

A-freakin'-men.

[Mark]

If it's voluntary, it isn't a disease. Full stop. The fact that you can become addicted to it means nothing. People are addicted to cigarettes, but that doesn't make them diseased.

I'm not taking that source seriously unless they have a PhD to back it up. That can be twisted in so many ways to further a point that's incorrect.

I think you need professional medical treatment, rosanna. I'd advise seeking it.

Like Nikki said, this feels more like an advertisement for self-mutilation, rather than an information session.

[rosanna]

Don't. You. DARE. Play. That. Card.

i would advise you to never ever try to be a therapist as your profession. you would end up starving to death.

i did this to inform people of what is going on, and you are obviously ignorant of what is going on. whatever if you don't agree with it, but don't sit there and tell people to go kill themselves. that is cruel, and as people here have this problem, you are effectively telling people to kill themselves because they have no other way of fixing it. i myself don't agree with it, i think it's wrong, but it is a problem and people need help with it. i am not going to shun someone because they cut themselves. i would rather help someone than hurt them. you have to see the world through a cutter's eyes. it is not the same as you see it.

[Mark]

Who the hell is telling you to kill yourself?

[Anthony]

well done, ros - you have discovered the power of copy and paste. and wikipedia too it seems. way to go.
look, you're annoying the hell out of me. you can have your own opinion sure but you can go fuck yourself sideways if you try to impose your opinion on me (like you actually appear to be doing)
no matter what long-winded and somewhat made-up definition you throw at me, my opinion will most likely stay the same

[Linja]

Look, guys. Cutting is something some people choose to do, it's not a disease, as Mark has already said, and it's certainly not a cure for your pain. While there may be a rush, in those few seconds after your blood has started to flow, it will soon ebb away, and leave you feeling emptier than ever. What a person needs is a close friend, to unload those troubles onto, and not take it out on themselves.

Personally, I prefer screaming into a pillow, or punching a wall, or a pillow, or letting everything out to a friend, but that's not always possible.

[Canadian Joe]

Personally, I prefer screaming into a pillow, or punching a wall, or a pillow, or letting everything out to a friend, but that's not always possible.

That's my approach to everything.

[.Amanda.]

i would advise you to never ever try to be a therapist as your profession. you would end up starving to death.

i did this to inform people of what is going on, and you are obviously ignorant of what is going on. whatever if you don't agree with it, but don't sit there and tell people to go kill themselves. that is cruel, and as people here have this problem, you are effectively telling people to kill themselves because they have no other way of fixing it. i myself don't agree with it, i think it's wrong, but it is a problem and people need help with it. i am not going to shun someone because they cut themselves. i would rather help someone than hurt them. you have to see the world through a cutter's eyes. it is not the same as you see it.

what. the. fuck.

you need help. AND comprehension skills.

And don't you ever tell me that I don't know what it's like to feel pain. 2 of the people on this board know what I mean. I don't need to go into detail just so that I can get you off my case.

Back the hell off.

Please someone close this, soon. This is, for real this time, my last post in the thread. I just don't want to see any more fighting. It's Christmas for God's sake.

[Mark]

This is starting to get too hostile. Closed.