Song - 'Death Is Just The End'

[altershot]

I duno if this is the right forum for this but oh well.

I wrote this song around 3-5 hours ago and I would really appreciate it if you guys could read it and review it for me...thx.

Death Is Just The End

My mind is like a swinging pendulum
Moving on through life without an aim
Flashing thoughts and distant memories
In life. In death. I have nothing left to gain.

So break me down
To a puddle on the floor
A puddle of blood and mishap
The pendulum isn’t swinging anymore.

My heart is like a roaring river
Flowing through the mist and fog
Breaking bones and cracking skulls
Hear my cry! Hear my plea!
When I tell you there is no aim
In life. In death. There’s nothing left to gain.

So break me down
To a puddle on the floor
A puddle of tears and sorrows
The river isn’t flowing anymore
I fear there will be no tomorrow
I can’t think straight now
Isn't it funny how
When life is meaningless to me
To me and my broken heart
I crumble and fall apart
To a pile of ash upon the floor
And now I know, I know
There's nothing left to gain

So when the fog and mist clears
There’ll be nothing left for me here
My mind is twisting through the black
Till it fades away and will never come back
So hear my cry, and hear my plea!
There is nothing left here for me.

Hear my cry! Hear my plea!
When I tell you there is no aim
In life and in death! There’s nothing left to gain!
For me.


Copyright. Darran Meader. 2003

[Omar]

I think those lyrics very much rock! If you ever record that song Id love to hear it, but the only suggestion I have is the title...to bleak. I suggest "Break Me Down" since u say that several times in the song :D But, VERY nice work B)

.: Omi

[Amy]

that is good! I agree with what Omi said about the name and everything!! good work ;)

[Mark]

those lyrics are great! i suggest you either record them or send them to a record company for cash. haha.

[LProckon]

very nicely written :)






but so depressing :(

[LPinmyHeart]

Incredible!!! You are very talented! :)

[altershot]

Thx....I actually formed a band yesterday, so it is a possibility that it will be recorded in the future. We just need a guitarist. Most of the titles for the songs I've writen aren't final yet...but thanks for the advice.